Page 68 of You Started It

“Thanks. How was the wedding?” he asks.

“It was great.”

A sharp gust of late October wind blows through and the windchime crashes to the ground. We both go to it immediately, crouching down at the same time and bumping our heads.

“Sorry,” we say simultaneously, before smiling.

Ben picks up the windchime; the bottoms are all tangled.

“Good luck unraveling that,” I say as we stand.

“Twisted wires are better than broken pieces. Easier to fix.”

“Sounds like a metaphor or something,” I say, tucking my hands into my sleeves as an awkward puff of laughter escapes. “I’m not so good with those.”

“You are the Homographs Queen. It’s one of the only things you except compliments on.”

“Accept,” I correct him automatically.

“I know, Jamie. I was just goofing around. We can still do that, can’t we?”

I walk to the edge of the porch and grip the railing, looking across the street to Axel’s home. It’s like I’m stuck in some time loop I can’t quite get out of. “I told you. I can’t be your friend. Especially when you keep spreading lies about Axel.”

“I’m not spreading lies.” Ben places the windchime down on the small table perched between two red Adirondack chairs before standing next to me. “Olivia told me about the DM.”

I turn to face him. “Did she show it to you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Did she show you a screengrab? Or hold her phone up to show you his message? Or did she just tell you about it?”

Ben’s face goes blank as he seems to think over my question. “She just told me about it.”

“Interesting,” I respond.

“What’s interesting?” Ben places his hand on my arm. I look up to find his hazel eyes on mine and I’m transported back to that Christmas Eve night again, standing in the same place, hanging the windchime. Ben grabbed my arm as I was about to go inside. When I turned back to look at him, he froze. It was like he couldn’t get the words out. He couldn’t be the one to make the first move, so I did. I pressed my lips up against his, making it official. Now here we are, almost three years later, in the same place but further apart than we’ve ever been. “What’s interesting, Jamie?”

“Olivia was at my mom’s salon today and showed me the DM. Axeldidask her to go for coffee and there were a string of responses from Olivia. Just as I was starting to read them, she pulled her phone away. So if you ask me, that’s just as sus. Or wait, what’s your favorite word? Shady.”

“Why are you with this guy, Jamie?”

“I guess I’m used to being around shady guys,” I reply, since I can’t admit that technically Axel didn’t do anything wrong by messaging Olivia, although I’m not thrilled that he did. I wrap my arms around myself as some sort of shield. I want to leave. I want to storm away dramatically, but my feet betray me, as if the ground is covered in thick glue. “It’s so ‘funny’ how you ran to Olivia the second we were over. Like it was this big, orchestrated plan the two of you devised. You didn’t even feel sorry or regretful. There was no grieving period.”

“It wasn’t like that, Jamie.”

“Maybe not. But you still betrayed me and what we had by opening your heart to someone else when your heart was supposed to belong to me.”

Ben rakes his fingers through his hair. “You wasted no time moving on with Axel.”

“I had to. You dumped me and the next day, she was already at your house, like this new trophy you were showing off to your family. Did they even ask about me? Ask what happened? What did you tell them?”

“I don’t understand why you insist on rehashing this over and over,” he says, shaking his head and walking away from me.

I follow and step up to him, pointing my finger to his face. “You’re a traitor. You sold me lies. Got me to believe you. Love you. Then you left. Just like my father did.”

“Why are you bringing your father into this? I’m nothing like him.”

“And how would you know?” I say, heat coming off my skin and forming sweat beads along my neck and chest. “You’ve never met him. Is that why you left me for Olivia?”