Page 12 of You Started It

Axel:I see you found me.

Me:Took a minute. Why AX?

Axel:Axel. Ax. You don’t get it?

Me:Are you American?

Axel:No. Y?

Me:Technically speaking, ax and axe are both correct, but usually British-English-speaking countries, like Canada, prefer to spell it a-x-e.

The three dots appear and disappear, on and off, for a few minutes.

Axel:Sorry. Your last message put me to sleep.

Me:Just be happy I didn’t use this as an opportunity to school you on all the axe idioms.

Axel:Maybe another time. So when do you want to meet up?

Me:Meet up?

Axel:If we want to make this thing believable, there should be a picture on the gram of the both of us. A couple selfie. And a hashtag.

Me:I have a question.

Axel:Yaaaas?

Me:Why are you so down to do this for me? For all you know, I could be a miscreant.

The three dots appear and disappear again.

Me:Corrupt. Evil.

Axel:A low-down dirty scoundrel?

Me:Yes. Wait. Are you mocking me? It’s hard to tell over text. I also don’t know you well enough to know if this is how you tell jokes or if maybe you’re just being oppugnant.

Axel:???

Me:It means combative or antagonistic.

Axel:I’m sorry. When did this become an English lesson?

Me:Words are kind of my thing. Especially homographs. They’re words that are spelled the same but have multiple meanings.

Axel:Is this how you won Ben over?

Me:No. My dad and I used to quiz each other on them. I guess it’s just a habit I’ve picked up and haven’t let go of yet.

Axel:Your dad doesn’t play along anymore?

Me:Kind of hard to since he’s not in the picture.

Axel:Sorry.

Me:It’s fine. Are you going to answer my question now?

Axel:I’m new. I don’t know anyone. But I don’t see how it could hurt to show up hand in hand with a senior babe on the first day of school.

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