Page 23 of On Thin Ice

“Oh, no,” I said with a dry little laugh. “I’m totally bi. Just, you know, my parents couldn’t seem to wrap their heads around that fact. Hell, I think they’d almost prefer it if I was gay. At least they understand what that means.”

I glanced down to pick at a fleck of basil on my plate, but when I spoke again, I lifted my face to look Ethan straight in the eye. “But liking both girlsandboys? That just gave them more ammo. Proof that I was confused. That I needed to be set straight—pun absolutely intended.”

Ethan nodded like he’d suspected as much. “You’ve never hidden that. I mean, not from what I’ve seen.”

“Never,” I agreed. “Well, not once I left home, anyway.” I scraped a hand through my loose hair, but it blew right back into my face. Damnit. I wish I had a hair tie. “I pretended to be what they wanted until I was old enough to leave, and then, well, I stopped pretending.”

Silence stretched between us for a few long beats. “Anyway. Congratulations,” I said, my voice quieter now. “You’re officially one of only ten people who know the real story.”

He didn’t try to offer some meaningless platitudes. He just looked at me and said, his voice soft, “That never should’ve happened to you.”

And goddamn, that simple statement hit harder than I expected. No judgment. No pity. Just the quiet kind of understanding I’d wanted from him without even realizing it.

A beat passed. Then another. And suddenly, I was way too aware of how close we were sitting. Of the breeze carrying the scent of jasmine and Ethan’s earthy cologne between us. Of the way the porch light haloed his profile in a soft glow.

It was quiet—too quiet—and the weight of everything I’d just admitted sat heavily on my shoulders. I’d said more just now about my past than I had in years. Had shown Ethan pieces of myself I usually kept locked down and smoothed over with jokes and swagger.

And he hadn’t judged me for any of it. If anything, it almost felt like he saw me in a way few really did.

And that scared the absolute shit out of me.

And when I felt this way, I did stupid shit. Said stupid things.

Generally turned into a fucking asshole.

I leaned back in my chair, rocking it onto two legs, my fingers hooked over the slats of the backrest. “Anyway. Going back to your earlier question,” I said, my voice outwardly casual while my pulse hammered in my neck. “I do like girls.” I balanced the chair there for a second before letting it fall back onto all fours with a softthud. “But I prefer guys.”

Ethan’s head snapped up, his gaze cutting to mine—sharp, startled, and oh so hungry.

I knew I should stop, but I couldn’t seem to pump the brakes on my mouth. Becausethatlook on his face? That flicker of heat, the crack in his careful composure?

It lit a fuse that I felt low in my gut.

And it made me reckless.

And yeah, a bit of an asshole, too.

But I had to know. Had to see.

Needed to find out.

“There’s just something about all that strength, you know?” I continued, my voice dipping lower, growing rougher, like we were sharing an intimate secret.

Which, I guess, in a way, I was sharing that with him. Even though he hadn’t asked me to, I couldn’t stop myself from speaking.

“There’s just something about watching a man crack open for you. And hearing the sounds he makes when he finally lets go?” A physical shiver passed through me, and I didn’t try to hide it. “Fuck. It’s addictive.”

For half a second, I thought I’d gone too far. Regretted pushing. Thought maybe I’d misread the moment.

But then his eyes dropped to my mouth, and his pupils dilated.

His breath stuttered, and his fingers flexed against the edge of the table, his knuckles turning white.

I watched as heat bloomed in his cheeks, his complexion betraying him.

Blood rushed south so fast it made me dizzy. I’d been half-hard already, but seeing the physical manifestations of Ethan’s desire had my cock tenting my shorts. My whole body was primed and thrumming, caught somewhere between panic and pure, unfiltered need, my heart hammering in my chest loud enough that I was sure he could hear it.

I didn’t even realize I was leaning toward him until his chair scraped over the flagstones with a loudscreech.