Page 95 of Fumbled Into Love

I told the media I had a girlfriend.

I asked Nathalie to be my fake girlfriend.

I insisted she move in with me when her apartment flooded.

I started to fall in love with her.

It all comes down to me.

My phone dings, echoing throughout the quiet room, and I snatch it.

That’s fine.

I can talk to him.

I can handle it.

That’s fineis not the answer I was hoping for, but given how weird the last sleepover was, I should have kept my expectations low.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Henry prods when I set my phone down, and I shake my head.

There’s no point in talking about it.

I’m falling in love with her. There’s no way of stopping it, and it’s not real for her the way it is for me. She can separate her emotions from the physical. To her, this is a friends-with-benefits situation. For me, it’s so much more.

It’s everything missing from my relationship with Savannah. The man I am with her is a version of myself I thought I lost after I broke off my engagement.

Nathalie brought me back to life.

It’s not her fault I feel the way I do.

Henry bites his lip, but Declan has none of Henry’s self-restraint and slams his water down on the table.

“You need to get it out,” he demands, “Whatever you’re keeping to yourself is eating you alive.” Jack’s lips quiver, fighting a smile, and Henry's eyes widen at the serious tone in Declan’s voice. “Sharon has told me the longer you hold onto something, the more time it’s allowed to fester, to eat at thehappiness in your life until it takes over. So, whatever it is, spit it out. We won’t judge you.”

Jack and Henry nod in agreement.

I’m unsure if it’s the concern in Declan’s gaze or the steadily built trust between my friends, but the confession tumbles from my lips, nonetheless.

“I almost married someone who never cared about me, and all it took to realize that was a few monthspretendingwith Nathalie. For years, I loved someone…who didn’t treat me right.”

I squeeze the fidget ball, my words nothing more than a whisper in the quiet room. The gazes of my friends are heavy against my skin, but I lack the courage to look at them.

“In a few short months, Nathalie has shown me what I lacked in my last relationship, and none of it is real. Myfake girlfriendhas offered more compassion and affection than the woman I thought I would marry.

“She cheated on me. My ex-fiancee. Found her in bed with my teammate.” Declan gasps, and someone grabs my shoulder, squeezing. “For Nathalie, this is casual. No feelings. After the auction, she’s going to move on, but I’ll be stuck forever because no one understands me the way she does.”

“How’s that?”Jack prods.

I answer with brute honesty.

“For the first time, I’m important to someone. I’m missed when I’m gone, and our moments together are cherished. My opinion matters, and my thoughts and emotions are acknowledged. Savannah never once made me feel that way.”

“Well…shit,” Declan mutters, “Why don’t you tell her any of that?”

“She never asked for any of this. Not to be my fake girlfriend. Not to have to move in with me. She never asked for me to fall—”

I stop, but we can all fill in the blanks of the statement.

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