Page 58 of Fumbled Into Love

McDonald’s drive-through.

Mind-boggling orgasm.

No communication since.

I casually leave out that I have a small crush.

When I finish, the table is eerily silent, and I swipe my meal from Maren as she processes and dig into my food.

“Oh, wow.” Maren blinks, the most stunned I’ve ever seen her in my life. “Wow.”

“That’s exactly what Deon said after I gave him a blow job,” I quietly admit between bites and Sawyer cackles.

“Pay up, Parker,” Maren declares with a smirk, palm outstretched.

“She didn’t admit it,” Sawyer counters. “You haven’t won yet.”

“Admit what?” My eyebrows crinkle. “Did you guys bet we would sleep together?”

That’s not nice of them, but all of our friends bet on stupid shit, so I’m not surprised.

“No. Sawyer, and I bet you have a crush on him,” Maren says, and the blood drains from my face.

“W-What? When?” Maren lifts a brow, and Sawyer relents, dropping a piece of paper into Maren’s palm. “I—I didn’t admit to anything!” I yell, desperately trying to convince them I don’t have feelings for Deon.

Developing feelings for the man you’re fake dating is dumb.

Harboring feelings for someone who doesn’t believe in love is downright idiotic.

Agreeing to be his fake girlfriend with benefits is certifiably insane.

I have decided to do all three of those things, but I don’t want to admit that to Sawyer or Maren, not when I’ve barely come to terms with it myself.

I’m going to get myself hurt in this agreement, and I have only myself to blame.

Sawyer smiles apologetically. “You really didn’t have to. Your response was enough.” She pats my hand. “We had a feeling.”

“A feeling?”

“You spent all of Halloween talking about him while he was gone, and then he came back, and you were glued to his side.” Maren raises her voice an octave to mimic me, “Did you know Deon likes mint chocolate chip ice cream? He’ssotidy it’s insane. We watch a dating show together, and he even made a bracket. Did you know he does puzzles?”

“That’s not true,” I defend, though it falls short. I may have spent a chunk of time talking about him, but I was updating them. They always want to know the details, so I was simply giving them that.

“I don’t think it's a bad thing,” Maren admits. “You two work well together. He’s reserved and cautious, and you bring out a bit of playfulness in him. He couldn’t do any better than you.”

I blush at Maren’s compliment, but the truth of the reality is he doesn’t want a relationship the way I do, and I’m not going to force that on him.

“We’re not compatible,” I say, and the words sour my stomach, ruining my meal.

“How so?” Sawyer asks, “You seem pretty great together.”

“I want the loud type of love,” I admit quietly, “the ‘I can’t breathe without you’ kind of relationship that sets your world on fire. I want what you two found. Deon doesn’t want that.”

Maren hums. “I didn’t think I was going to fall in love with Jack. I was quite clear I wanted the opposite: for him to stay far, far away.”

“Henry was in love with me for years, and I had no idea.” Sawyer chuckles, “If you told college Sawyer she was married to Henry, she would have called you insane.”

“I don’t understand.”

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