Page 118 of Fumbled Into Love

“Just curious,” I cough out, instead of the dozen other things I want to say to her.

Her head tilts as she examines me and I spin on my heels, escaping into the dim lighting in my bedroom, leaping beneath the covers, and pulling the gift I bought her out of the drawer. Gordie launches and attacks my feet, claws out, as I settle and I hiss when one of his claws passes through the sheet.

Nathalie appears in her ugly dress and my heart stops beating when she smiles at me. I keep silent as she digs through her suitcase and then hops onto the other side of the bed.

My hands shake with nerves when I hand her the two boxes, wrapped with gnome wrapping paper.

“Merry Christmas.”

“Deon…I—”

“Open it,” I demand and she slowly peels away the wrapping on the larger box. A soft gasp is only her response when she opens the e-reader I bought her. “It’s so you can always have a book with you.”

I rub the back of my neck, self-conscious of the gift. We never said we were going to exchange gifts, but I wanted to give her something since she’s given me so much.

“Thank you,” she croaks, gently setting it down and opening the next gift.

This is the one I’m nervous about, the gift that gives her a peek into my heart in a way only she would understand.

Arwen’s Evenstar dangles on a solid silver chain, the necklace she gave Aragorn when she told him she would choose a mortal life with him over an immortal one without him.

It’s a love declaration.

The only one I can make right now.

Watery eyes meet mine.

“Will you put it on?” she asks, throwing her hair over one shoulder.

I take the necklace, willing my fingers to settle so I can clasp the delicate chain. My fingers linger a moment longer than necessary after it’s done.

“It’s beautiful.” It’s her only comment, but when her eyes meet mine again, a sadness flickers over them that I don’t understand. “Thank you.”

Does she understand what I’m saying?

Nathalie sinks into bed, and discomfort settles beneath my heart, right beside my love for her. I’m trying to work on her cues and on what she’s giving me.

If I confess, will she feel the same? I don’t want to fumble a chance with her. I want to hold her tight and keep her close, but I don’t think I can risk the fall if I don’t know she’ll fall with me.

If I’m meant to fumble, I want her to fumble right alongside me.

I’m half asleep when Nathalie inches closer to whisper, “My toes are cold.”

In a groggy haze, I lift my legs so she can stuff her feet between them. Her head falls against the crook of my armpit when my arm rises to make room and sleep pulls me under, I swear I hear her say, “I’m going to miss this when I have to leave.”

CHAPTER 26

“Lay me down and kiss me deeply, show me everything I missed”

The Heart Is a Muscle – Gang of Youths

Nathalie

“Where are we going?” Declan asks as I drag him out of the house under the cover of darkness.

“Be quiet,” I hiss, “or you’ll wake up Deon, and this will be for nothing.”

We tiptoe to his car parked on the road.

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