Page 38 of The SEALs' Single Mom Baby Surprise

Not right now.

The overwhelming terror in my gut is that if I push too hard, they'll actually go.

I’ve never had someone fight to take care of me when I’m clear about not wanting them to. It’s their job. I know it, but my insides are jumbled and confusing.

I’m not anything more than a job. I can deal with that.

But I want things I shouldn’t. It’s making me more defensive. Especially when they try to manage me. I’d rather have watched Cole put the new door jamb together. To explain to me how it’s better, how it works, and the realities of someone trying to get in again.

I don’t like needing people. The best way not to need it is to be included in what’s happening.

I got left out of so much. I can’t survive it again.

My back is breaking from the pressure. The stress of everything. Every piece of my life over the last week has fallen apart.

Still, I can’t give up my control again. Not willingly.

Pep talk over, I repeat my mantra,I am capable, resilient, and worthy of my independence.

I chant the affirmations as I wash my hair and scrub my body clean.

The hot water runs out before I force myself out of the shower, dressed in PJ shorts and an oversized T-shirt. A towel twists around my head until my hair can dry some before bed. I hate having it soaking wet on my cheap pillow.

It’s like sleeping in a cold swamp.

Taking a deep breath, I pad back into the living room and sink into the couch as they all watch me. It’s not remotely the same way the men at Alistair’s parties stared at me.

Before, I wasn’t a real person—just eye candy for them to consume. But now, these men catalog everything about me with the intent to figure me out.

There’s a new chain on the door, and it yanks a laugh out of me.

God, I’m so tired.

“I don’t want to disrupt my daughter’s life again. Not so soon.”

The three of them hover around the couch, and it’s Cole who says, “We’ll do what we can, but keeping her safe is a higher priority.”

One thing I can’t be is stubborn in the face of my daughter’s safety. Fuck my pride if it means she might get hurt.

She’s the reason I finally escaped Alistair. I couldn’t explain away his behavior anymore.

“I know that, but I can’t let my life fuck hers up any more than it has.”

A kitchen chair settles across from me, snapping my eyes back into focus. Cole lowers himself on the edge of it. The concern and determination give him a grave expression, but it’s one that also says he’s ready to fight to help me, even if it means fighting me.

His elbows prop on his knees as he leans forward. “We’re going to figure this out. And she’s going to come out of it fine. You both are.”

I nod, hating the defeat slowly crawling inside me like my carcass is hollowing out from rot. Gathering my legs into my arms, I lay my cheek on my knees and disappear for a few moments.

Cole dismisses Rhett and Shepard to do their work. They have to find a place to hide me away.

I’m so sick of hiding myself away.

My front door snips closed again, and the new locks click into place. The jiggle of the chain latching brings me back to Cole and his oversized presence. It’s looming as he sits beside me.

It’s difficult to stand against him, facing off, but now, it’s so much more. I lean my head back to look at him and those steely gray-blue eyes.

“What’s your first name?”

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