Page 73 of The Paris Chapter

‘She would be really proud of you,’ I said. We approached mybuilding. ‘Do you want to come in for a coffee and see the furniture?’ I winced inwardly at such a lame offer, but the thought of Ethan leaving me now suddenly panicked me.

Ethan took a moment to respond. I thought he might say no. And then I would have to resign myself to not having Ethan in my life any more. But he nodded. ‘Sure.’

I hoped he didn’t see how wide my smile was.

35

Ethan parked in my space that I never used as I didn’t have a car, and I led him up to my flat, opening the door and switching on the lights. He would be the first man in here apart from Luke. ‘Come in,’ I said, closing the door behind us as Ethan wandered through to the open-plan living area.

‘Honestly, thank you for tonight,’ I said as I followed him. ‘It was really kind of you to drive us to the hospital like that. I’m glad you were there.’

‘Yeah?’ He turned to look at me. ‘I’m glad I could help. And it all turned out okay.’

‘Me too. Carly and Luke are going to make great parents. I still can’t believe it’s twins.’ I shifted on my feet. ‘So, shall I make coffee?’

‘Do you have coffee?’ he asked with a smile.

‘Oh, shit.’ My cheeks flamed as I realised I had invited him back for coffee but I only drank tea and didn’t have any in the flat.

‘Tea is fine, Tessa,’ he said. ‘Oh, wow, the desk looks so good.’Ethan went over to look at the new addition, so I ducked into the kitchen area to put the kettle on, feeling embarrassed but relieved he hadn’t used it as a reason to make a quick exit.

‘I’m sorry we didn’t get to eat at your restaurant in the end,’ I called out as I made our tea.

‘You’ll have to come back. But to be honest, it’s not how I would run my own place. Going back there after two weeks in Paris just showed me all the things I want to do differently. So you could just wait to eat at mine and Juliette’s hopefully sometime soon.’

‘That’s a long time to wait without eating your delicious food. I’ve missed it,’ I said, carrying over the two cups of tea.

‘I’m happy to cook for you anytime,’ Ethan said as I handed him one of the mugs. Our fingers brushed for a second. I felt warmth travel all through my body, like he had given me an electric shock. Ethan seemed to realise what he had said and cleared his throat. ‘Well, uh, yeah, I mean…’ He trailed off awkwardly.

I was quite pleased he seemed as nervous as I felt. I turned to the desk – an easy thing to talk about. ‘It does look good in here, doesn’t it? The flat already feels so much homelier now.’

‘I’m glad,’ Ethan replied. ‘Are you writing at this desk? How is it going?’

‘I am. And good, I think. I’m sending my editor the chapters as I go. Setting it in Paris was such a good idea. I’m including all my favourite spots.’ I looked away shyly. ‘Like the ones you took me to.’

‘I’m so happy you’re enjoying writing again. I knew you would,’ Ethan said, pride unmistakable in his voice. ‘I finished your bookA Love Like Oursand I really did love it, Tessa. You’re so talented.’

‘Thank you.’ I walked over to the sofa and sat down with mycup of tea, suddenly tired from the night. I gestured to the coffee table. ‘The chess set looks good, doesn’t it?’ I hesitated. ‘Have you played since I left Paris?’

Ethan shook his head. He looked over at the mantelpiece and the print he had bought me in Paris propped up there. He sighed. ‘It seems like so long ago.’

‘I was so happy when you bought me that,’ I said softly.

Ethan came over and sat down on the sofa, but he left a big gap between us. ‘I was happy too,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry I was so distant back at Bon Appétit. It was such a shock to see you, and I assumed you and Joe were back together. Honestly, the thought of that made me so jealous, I could barely see straight.’

I sucked in a breath. ‘You don’t need to be jealous. I meant what I said – we are over for good.’

‘I still hate that you loved him first though. And that you almost did go back to him.’

‘We both made mistakes that day in Paris. I felt rejected by you, and that brought back how much what Joe did to me had hurt.’ I put my cup down on the coffee table and twisted to face him. ‘But thinking that you didn’t care I was leaving Paris and we’d never see each other again hurt so much more than what Joe did. Because he never cared about the real me, but you always seemed to.’

Ethan put his cup down and faced me too. ‘I do care about you, Tessa. And you know I like you for exactly who you are.’

‘That’s how I feel.’

Ethan looked hopeful, but he sighed. ‘What if neither of us can trust how the other one feels though? We didn’t in Paris.’

‘I know. But think about all the time we spent together before Joe showed up. I felt so close to you. Can’t we feel that way again? Or… even more?’ I asked him, putting my heart on the line. I was terrified. I had put my trust in the wrong man before and I was scared to follow my heart again. But Carly and Juliette had been right tonight that I could miss out on something that was potentially really special by being scared. I had been too impulsive before and made bad decisions, but Paris had shown me that I didn’t want to give up on love. And that meant taking a leap sometimes.

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