Page 69 of The Paris Chapter

Shit.I hated to hear the pain in his voice. ‘But I wouldn’t have kissed him if I didn’t think you were making all these future plans that wouldn’t include me. You said you’d tell me what Joe told you after you met him; I even messaged you but you didn’t reply. You went to tell Juliette and not me. So when Joe told me your plan, I believed it. I thought you didn’t care enough to talk to me about it all,’ I said, pain creeping into my voice too.

‘I wanted to tell you face-to-face,’ Ethan said. ‘I told Joe that, so he said where to meet you both. Oh…’ He trailed off and left the desk to pace in front of me a little bit. ‘He wanted me to come and find you after the boat, to see you together. He probably even planned to kiss you so I would see it.’

I stared at Ethan, shocked. I thought back to that day by the Seine. How the romantic boat trip, coupled with Joe’s promises that he wanted me and knowing Ethan would be staying in Paris, had made me wonder if I should get back with Joe. And when he’d leaned in to kiss me, I had let him. It had just been for a moment but Ethan had been there to see it. I remembered then the look on Ethan’s face when he saw the kiss. He had looked crushed.

Did Joe make sure Ethan would see us?

33

For a second, I almost protested that Joe couldn’t bethatmanipulative, but he had fooled both me and Rachel for six months. He was a liar, and he was selfish. He didn’t want Ethan to have me so did all he could to come between us. I felt sick. ‘I’m so pissed off I let him manipulate me like that!’ I cried.

‘We both did,’ Ethan said quietly.

‘I just felt so rejected when he did what he did that knowing he wanted me back… I got swept up in it for a moment,’ I said, hating that Joe making me feel like I was never good enough made me want to go back to him because finally, he did. How pathetic was that?

‘And you didn’t trust me.’

I looked at Ethan. He was right. ‘I was worried I was getting carried away with you, with us… I rushed into things with Joe and look at what happened. So when he told me you would be moving to Paris, that just confirmed that I was getting carried away thinking we could be something after our holiday. I was so impulsive with Joe, moving in with him so quickly, what if I just keep making bad decisions when it comes to relationships? I was scared, I think.’

‘I was scared too. I felt like I was second best compared to Joe. I think he did manipulate us, but we clearly weren’t ready for what was happening between us.’

‘I wished we hadn’t let him,’ I said quietly. ‘When it was just us two in that apartment…’ I trailed off, hoping he would know what I meant. Hoping he had felt the same pull to me as I had to him.

Ethan nodded. ‘I know. But we did let him, didn’t we?’

We looked at one another. There was still the same connection between us now that we’d had in Paris, but our time alone together in that apartment was over. We had crumbled once we left it, and I had no idea if we could ever get past that. Joe had come between us far too easily.

‘You don’t trust me,’ Ethan said then.

‘Nor do you,’ I replied defensively. Ethan had easily believed I’d chosen Joe over him; he couldn’t have thought I had any real feelings for him. But I knew I had. When he had kissed me and touched me, I felt closer to him than any man before him. Had he felt any of that too?

‘Tessa…’ Ethan began. I really hoped he would tell me that he could trust me, trust us, one day. He started to say more but the office door swung open suddenly behind me, making us both jump.

‘I’m sorry, but Carly needs you,’ Juliette cried at me from the doorway.

‘What do you mean?’ I asked, seeing the panic in her eyes.

‘She is bleeding,’ Juliette said. ‘They are trying to get an Uber but it’s all busy.’

‘Oh no,’ I said, moving towards the door instantly. ‘I’ll try mine,’ I said, pulling out my phone to open the app.

‘I have my car,’ Ethan said from behind me.

I turned around. ‘What?’

‘My car is outside; let me drive you all to the hospital,’ Ethan said. ‘Juliette, will you cover?’

‘No, I’m coming. I will tell Marco…’ She disappeared again.

Ethan sighed but turned to me. ‘I’ll just change, then we can go.’

I hesitated but I knew Carly and Luke would be worried sick and desperate to get to the hospital quickly, so Ethan’s offer to drive us would be very welcome. ‘Okay, thank you,’ I said gratefully, hurrying out of the office. I glanced back and he gave me a reassuring smile. It reminded me of how calm he could be and how much I had liked that about him. I felt a tiny bit better as I hurried out of the restaurant to find Carly and Luke pulling their coats on and looking worried.

‘Ethan’s going to drive us,’ I told them as I hurried over to our table.

‘Oh, thank God,’ Luke said.

Ethan appeared in record time, changed out of his work clothes and clutching his car keys.