Page 68 of The Paris Chapter

When Ethan joined us, they did the same with him. I watched, waiting for Ethan to look at me, but he seemed not inclined to do so. I couldn’t bear this. It was so awkward. We had felt so close for a moment; now we weren’t even speaking.

I snapped myself out of my silence and stood up, turning to Ethan. ‘Can we talk?’ I asked him. Our friends stared at us but I tried to tune them out.

Finally, Ethan faced me. His blue eyes met mine and I drankthem eagerly as I had been sure I’d never look in them again. ‘I’m at work…’ he said gruffly.

‘You can take a ten-minute break,’ Juliette said. ‘Go into the office; I’ll keep Carly and Luke company,’ she added, sitting down in my seat.

Ethan looked at her like she was paining him, but he sighed. ‘Okay, fine.’ He turned around and set off towards the double doors he had just come out of. I glanced at our friends. Juliette gave me an encouraging wave of her hand, Luke looked concerned and Carly gave me a small smile. With a deep breath, I took off after Ethan, my heart thumping in my chest. I never expected to find him here at Bon Appétit but now I had, I was desperate to clear the air between us. We’d never be as we were in Paris, but maybe one day we could be friends.

Ethan led me into the small office to the side of the kitchen, which was hot and noisy and smelled delicious. I walked in and he closed the door behind us so we were suddenly in a quiet bubble together. ‘What are you doing here, Tessa?’ Ethan said, leaning against the desk and folding his arms across his chest. ‘Is Joe coming too?’

‘What? No…’ I shook my head, hovering awkwardly between Ethan and the door behind me. ‘I just wanted to try your food, to come here, as I never had. But what are you doing here?’

Ethan raised an eyebrow. ‘I work here. Why would you not expect to see me?’

I was thoroughly confused now. ‘Because I thought you were in Paris.’

‘My course finished so I came home. And Juliette joined me so we could keep working on our restaurant plans.’ Ethan sighed. ‘As much as I enjoy this chit-chat, I am at work so…’ He made to get off, leaning against the desk.

I shook my head. ‘But Joe said you were staying in Paris. I honestly didn’t think you’d be here tonight.’

‘Sorry to disappoint you,’ Ethan huffed.

‘I didn’t say it was a disappointment; I’m just surprised and confused.’ I thought about everything Joe and Ethan had said in Paris. ‘And you didn’t disagree when I said I thought you were staying in Paris to work on the restaurant with Juliette. Joe told me you two are opening one there so I assumed you’d be staying on.’

‘I never said I was staying in Paris beyond my course. Look, Tessa, is there any point in going over that last day in Paris? We said goodbye then, and I don’t really feel the need to do it again. If Joe is coming, you better get back to the table anyway.’

I frowned. ‘Why do you think Joe is coming?’

‘You left Paris with him, I saw you kissing – you’re back together!’ Ethan cried.

‘No,’ I said, shaking my head. ‘I won’t lie that for a minute I was tempted, but I told him that we were over. He doesn’t make me happy. I don’t feel good when I’m with him. He isn’t the man for me. I don’t want to be with him,’ I said, all in a rush. There might not be any future for us but he needed to know that I hadn’t chosen Joe.

Ethan’s chest sagged and he un-crossed his arms. ‘You aren’t back together?’ he asked. I couldn’t tell if he looked more confused or relieved. My heart thumped a little bit harder to think there might be some relief inside him. I couldn’t help it.

‘Definitely not. And you’re not moving back to Paris? Joe said you’d always planned to open your restaurant with Juliette there…’

‘He did? No, that was never our plan. Juliette has always wanted to do it here in London with me. Where a French bistromight have a unique selling point. And she wants to do it on her own, away from her family…’

I definitely felt relief. It rushed over me like something I couldn’t stop. I exhaled unsteadily. Knowing Ethan would be in London too felt like huge news. Then I shook my head. ‘Why did Joe tell me that then? He told me about the money your mum left you and how you could now make your dream come true, and that you’d be in Paris. It made me think that…’ I trailed off, not wanting to admit it had upset me to think we’d be living in different countries, that there would be no future for us. It felt too honest after not seeing each other since our awkward encounter by the Seine.

‘Joe is a liar,’ Ethan replied simply. ‘He told me after you two left that you were going to try again; that’s why I didn’t get in contact with you. After we said goodbye at the river, I thought about finding you and asking you to stay, but when he messaged me that, I knew there was no point. I assumed you were back together.’

‘What a dick,’ I burst out.

Ethan’s mouth twitched. ‘I think you’re right. I guess he tried to manipulate the situation to stop… well, us.’

The word ‘us’ made me smile.

‘It worked though,’ Ethan added.

My smile faded instantly.

‘We let him do it, didn’t we? So, whatever we had just wasn’t strong enough.’

‘But we didn’t know he was lying,’ I said, hating that Joe had made us doubt each other so much. So easily. ‘That wasn’t our fault.’

‘We could have talked to one another though, found out the truth.’ He sighed. ‘Tessa, I was so jealous when I saw you and Joe kissing by the river. It reminded me that you loved him first. He’sthe kind of man you are looking for. A million miles away from me. I hated that you had chosen him over me. It hurt. A lot. I can’t get the image out of my head…’

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