Page 59 of The Paris Chapter

I jumped as Joe appeared beside me.

‘Why did you tell Ethan we were working things out?’ I asked him.

‘Aren’t we?’ Joe asked, eyebrow raised.

‘I don’t know. This has all come out of the blue. I’m confused. I haven’t heard from you in two months; it’s a lot to take in. And Ethan?—’

‘Isn’t the right man for you,’ Joe broke in. ‘You need a romantic hero, Tessa.’

‘Like you?’ I enquired with a raised eyebrow.

He missed the sarcasm though. He grabbed my hand with his. ‘Yes,’ he said fiercely. ‘I’m the man you write about, aren’t I?’

‘You’re thetypeof man I have written about,’ I acknowledged. Handsome, charming and rich. Joe was like the love interests in my books. But then he had broken my heart. ‘But a lot has changed since we met.’

‘You haven’t changed,’ he replied confidently.

Haven’t I?

‘I know you can love me again. Why don’t we go home and see what happens? You don’t want to stay in Paris now, surely?’

Joe’s question hung in the air.

I had been so excited to stay in the city longer – to work on my book and spend more time with Ethan. But everything had changed. Suddenly, I wondered if Carly had been right all along and I had made another bad decision about my love life – falling into something so quickly with Ethan. My priority should be my book. But once again, my impulsive heart had pulled me into something that I wasn’t ready for. Joe arriving again had shown that. I had let him kiss me. Part of me had wanted him to. Although I was having a good time with Ethan. The problem was, I wasn’t sure I trusted either Ethan or Joe, and I definitely didn’t trust my heart. I was confused and lost. And coming to Paris had seemed to be the answer, but now I had no idea what the answer was.

‘Maybe I should go home,’ I said both to myself and to Joe.

28

‘What are you doing?’ Juliette demanded from the doorway of her guest bedroom. I had sent her a message after Joe had walked me back to her apartment and told her I was planning to leave Paris today. She had rushed from Cinq to catch me, and I had heard her throw a disgruntled greeting to Joe, who was waiting for me in the living room.

‘Um… packing my things,’ I said, pausing as I folded a T-shirt into my case. I was becoming a pro at packing at this point.

‘But why are you leaving? I thought you wanted to stay!’ Juliette said, shaking her head.

‘Things have changed,’ I replied, going back to the task in hand. ‘You and Ethan have lots to sort out and I need to do the same in London.’

She leaned in closer. ‘Don’t tell me you mean you and thatmanin there,’ she said, practically spitting the word ‘man’. ‘Ethan told me he saw you kissing!’

‘It’s complicated,’ I said, lowering my voice in case Joe could hear us. ‘I was with Joe a long time, we lived together, I loved him. He is sorry, he’s not with the other woman any more…’

‘But what about Ethan?’

‘What about him?’ I snapped back, my heart aching at the thought of him. ‘He didn’t try to stop me leaving. He has future plans that don’t involve me. We hardly know each other after all.’

‘Non. That’s not true. I’ve seen you together,’ she argued. ‘You’re making a mistake getting back with Joe.’

‘You’re just like my friend Carly. Can everyone stop telling me what’s best for me please?’ I threw my hands up in the air. I was so confused. Everyone seemed so sure I was doing something wrong all the time. Was it any wonder I was terrified of making another mistake?

‘What about your writing though?’ Juliette asked.

‘I have spent enough time here to be able to write the book. There is no way I’m going to make my deadline anyway so I need to speak to my publisher.’ I bit my lip; that thought was terrifying. I wanted to put it off for as long as possible. The same way I wanted to avoid any more decision making. ‘Paris has been fun but this isn’t real life. I can’t stay on holiday forever.’

‘I thought you liked it here,’ she said quietly. I could see our conversation was upsetting her but I didn’t know what to do. I was just as upset by the thought of leaving but how could I stay and watch Ethan and her make their dreams come true and know I wouldn’t be part of it?

Ethan doesn’t want me to stay anyway.

Him walking away from me earlier would hurt for a long time, I knew. There was nothing left for me in Paris.

---