Page 81 of Emylia

So real.

My father was never coming back; I would never see him again.

One moment, I was barely holding it together, the next, it felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. The air left me with a loud whoosh, replaced by a sadness that clouded everything.

Without a word, Maalikai wrapped his arms around me, guiding my head to his chest. Taken by surprise, I didn’t object, I surrendered myself to him as I fought the urge to cry.

“Grief is not weakness.” Lips as soft as freshly budded rose petals brushed the top of my head as he spoke.

Tiny translucent teardrops caressed my cheeks. Losing myself in the pain, I let one sob after another escape. They weren’t beautiful–they were harsh and grainy in my chest, wringing the grief out of me.

After what felt like an eternity, I pulled the broken pieces of myself into a shaky mess.

All too suddenly, I became aware that Maalikai softly stroked his fingers through my hair. Berating myself for my momentary lapse of sanity, I pushed myself from his chest, wiping my tears with the back of my hand.

I forced a pathetic smile. “I’m sorry.”

Gliding a thumb tenderly over my cheek, Maalikai wiped away the last remaining tears. “Don’t be sorry. Not for this.”

A fissure broke within my chest. A rare moment of transparency escaped my normally impenetrable heart.

“Thank you.”

Maalikai’s brows furrowed, “For what?”

I took a shaky breath; the weight of my words being set free. “For making me feel like I’m not weak.”

All my life, I’d felt unworthy, never meeting the expectations of my peers. The one thing I knew without question was that I was a force to be reckoned with, and I wanted to prove it to the world.

And prove it to myself.

I’d trained my whole life to become a badass, honing my skills through countless hours of training.

Weakness was not an option.

Vulnerability was not an option.

But here I was, not familiar with this level of vulnerability. Anything but complete composure was a weakness.

“I refuse to be weak.”

“You’re anything but weak.”

There it was again. The racing of my heart, sent into overdrive by mere words.

When I studied the perfect curve of Maalikai’s face, the last thing I’d been expecting was desolation shadowing his features. My heart tightened at the sight; swallowing deeply, I prepared myself for an answer I wasn’t sure I was ready for.

“Areyouokay?”

A stuttered breath filled his lungs before he let it out in a loud whoosh. “I guess seeing your grief made me remember my own.”

Oh my gosh.Iwas the source of his pain, or at least the catalyst.

“You lost someone you love?”

“Both my parents. They died when I was a baby, causalities of Crixus’ war.” Voice void of any emotion, it was like Maalikai had come to terms with his loss a lifetime ago.

I think that was harder to witness than if he’d broken down in tears. My limbs went numb, heavy with the realization of the pain I’d unintentionally caused.

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