Page 49 of Because of Me

The heat of her father’s stare burns the side of my face, but I ignore him. Amira’s nod is so slight I might have missed it if I blinked. But she holds my hands tightly as we take the scarf off together. I tuck it over my elbow, then wrap my arm around her waist as we turn to her father. Leaning down, I kiss her temple and whisper in her ear. “You lead?”

Again, she nods, this time straightening her shoulders as she looks to her father.

“Sorry we didn’t get to you before dinner.” Her voice is chirpy and bright but strained. Not at all the soft honey I’ve grown used to.

“Hmm well, it seems priorities change,” Mr Solak grunts. The two thick lines between his brows seem to deepen. “Although, I should be thankful you didn’t try to bring a woman again.”

My ears begin to throb and heat. Against Amira’s waist my hand clenches into a fist.Fuck, he really is terrible. I swallow my pride, knowing if ever there was a time to make a scene, it’s definitely not now.

“I’m thankful she chose to bring me too,” I say instead.

Amira shivers underneath my arm, I pull her closer to me, but she follows her chill with a soft shimmy of her shoulders and steps forward.

“The thing is,Baba,” she chokes a little on the word before continuing, “if I was dating a woman again, I would never introduce you to her. I learnt that lesson a long time ago.”

I try not to think that her words mean shewantsto date a woman again. Try not to think about how I don’t want her dating anyone else, ever again. I want her all to myself, but I know the thought of forever is overwhelming for her.

She stands a little taller as her father balks down at her. He blinks rapidly, processing her comment, and his mouth falls open as he stumbles for words. His eyes track down to Amira’s bare shoulders, then to my hand on her waist, before jumping back up to her face. Taking a step forward he towers over her, and I move closer as my protective instinct kicks in.

Clearing his throat Mr Solak lowers his voice to address his daughter. “Amira your dress is—”

“Beautiful.” I cut him off, uninterested in what he has to say but also to protect Amira from hearing the words she’s been dreading all day.

“Well yes, but it would be better if—”

“It would be better if it was white.” I can’t help myself, and I instantly want to take the words back for fear Amira will understand what I mean and be terrified by the idea of herself in a wedding dress. She doesn’t react, but I tap my finger against her hip in a silent apology all the same.

Mr Solak reels in shock, doing his best to glare down his nose at me. In the end, he just looks taken aback and honestly, a little pathetic. I pull Amira a little closer, and the air seems to whoosh from her lungs.

“Do you have anything nice to say?” she asks.

Everything about her demeanour has turned timid again, and I fucking hate he caused that. I hate that for every tiny step she gains the courage to take, he’s there, ready to tear her back down.

Finally, he steps back, crossing his arms over his chest. I tuck my free hand into my pocket but stay close to Amira.

He clears his throat again and tips on his heels. “It would be … so kind … if you were to come and meet someone. His father is like a brother to me, and I think you would get along. You certainly have more in common than you and … Noah here.” Although he waves his hand in my direction, he keeps his grumpy eyes locked on Amira. “But bring that scarf, please. Some things should be kept for more intimate moments.”

“This wouldn’t happen to be the ‘fine young man’ from Kaya’s wedding, would it?” Amira holds up her hands to make quotes around the words. When her father nods in response, she huffs in frustration.

“If you cared to find out, you’d learn Noah is more thanfine. He is a perfect gentleman, and I’ve never felt as special as I do when I’m with him. And besides, we have plenty in common. He makes wine, and I drink it.” Her hand falls to mine and she squeezes my wrist before peeling away from my hold. “Speaking of, our glasses are empty. I’m going to get a refill.”

She turns her back on her father, grabbing our wine glasses from the table to storm off towards the bar. And a little like a lost puppy, I watch her go.

I’m about to chase after her, to remind her I’m driving so I shouldn’t have another glass and just tobe with her, when Mr Solak coughs into his hand. Swallowing down the anger that’s closing in on my throat, I turn my head to him.

“She should be with a man who shares her heritage. Family is important.”

“Amirais important. How can you expect her to value family, when it’s her family who makes her feel like she can’t be herself?” I pull together every morsel of self-control I have to keep my voice low and my stance neutral. I will not start a fight with her father. I cannot start a fight with her father.

I suspect he’s only a handful more shitty moments before Amira decides to cut him off for good, but I can’t make that decision for her.

“And can she truly be herself with you? A man?”

He went there. My hands ball into fists by my sides, but I know I can’t react.

“I trust that she cares for me. I trust she knows herself enough to know who she wants to be with. A man or a woman.”

“Do you, though? If you really trusted her, why are you not married?”