Page 8 of Because of Her

“Now that, I can agree with.”

By the time my ticket number is called, the sun has finished setting behind the buildings. It’s cold as we walk home. Amira hugs the hot food, and fusses when I detour into thebottle shop to grab some cold beers and seltzers. I have vague memories of Callum preferring pale ales, so that’s what I grab.

“It’s going to be an interesting few weeks isn’t it?” Amira scoffs as I step back outside.

I meet her side eye by rolling my own.

CALLUM

After Cassidy went running down the hall in a coughing fit, I collapsed on the couch. I’m exhausted, physically and mentally, but mostly, emotionally.

Today’s move was always going to take it out of me, and I’m glad my family came along to support me, but seeing Cassidy at the end of it all felt like a solid kick to the balls. It’s been years. Many, many years. Years that on my side, include a failed marriage, and a complete lifestyle change when I became a father. Seeing Cassidy again reminded me of how carefree I used to be. How I used to dive into anything I wanted. Except Cassidy. And now she is back in my life. I’m wondering why that was.

She’s still as gorgeous as I remember, if not more so. The years have treated her well. She grew into her teenage lankiness and now owns her petite frame. Her brunette hair is longer, and a shade lighter in the sections framing her face. When she looked up at me through her thick lashes and I saw the deep green of her eyes, my memory flashed to all the times I spent blindly staring into them.

We had been two anxious teenagers, finding solace in each other’s company. The comfort grew as we did, until the difference in our age was no longer significant. Friendship grew into love, but the anxiety remained, and I was so worried I would screw everything up if I told her how I felt.

Looking back, I can’t believe how utterly idiotic I had been not to. Even when she literally sat on my lap and gave me the chance I’d been waiting for. Memories of how mypulse raced in all the wrong ways and I forgot how to breathe threaten to tip me back over the edge of my anxiety.

I’ve never believed in fate, but my sister would say the universe shoved Cassidy back into my life for a reason. Something about reigniting my inner child, rediscovering myself after divorce. If she was here, I’d tell her it’s a load of crock. But I have to admit there is something about Cassidy coming back into my life at this moment that feels … right.

If I’m thinking this deeply into fate and destiny and gifts from the universe, I’m clearly exhausted. And hungry. Which is why I jumped at the chance when Cassidy’s friend offered to bring dinner home. I have, quite literally, zero food in the apartment. This time on a Saturday, UberEats would have taken hours, even so close to Main Street. I was not looking forward to the wait. My stomach grumbles in agreement.

As I drift about, waiting for the women to returnAs I drift about, waiting for the women to return, I’m regretting my decision. The last thing I need is to force small talk for the sake of being social, and pretending my life isn’t one big happy never after. Especially with Cassidy, considering how seeing her has turned my brain into hippy goo.

Part of me wonders if my body is waiting until the sun goes down before the emotions come flooding out. Just like they have most nights for the past six months.

I check the time, calculating how long it’s been since the women left to get food against how long I assume it will take. They didn’t mention how far this Italian place was, or even how they were getting there. But, waiting for food would have been at least twenty minutes.

I decide to make the phone call. If I don’t, it’ll be Maisie’s bedtime before I’ve had a chance to finish my food. Calling to tell her goodnight, knowing I won’t be there when she wakes up in the morning, is almost too painful.

My hand trembles as I pick up my phone, scrolling down the messenger app until I find Audrey’s name and hit thecall button. After she picks up, the video is loading but I can hear her calling out.

“Maisie, Daddy is on the phone!”

A second later, the video comes on, and a smile brighter than the sun fills the screen.

“Hey, chicka,” I say, choking on the lump forming in my throat.

“Daddy I had a bath withsprinkles!”

“Bath salts!” Audrey calls out from somewhere off screen. I appreciate the way Audrey has made something as mundane as a bath such a fun experience for Maisie.

Despite how incompatible we were as partners, I hold so much respect for Audrey, and how devoted she is to motherhood.

Maisie pulls the phone back a little until I can seemostof her face.

“Wow, sprinkles! That sounds fun.” I put on a cheerful expression, even though I don’t feel it. “I called to say goodnight.”

“Oh.” The light drains from her face. “I forgot you weren’t coming home.”

“I know, Maisie, I’m sorry.”

Suddenly, the screen is full of bubbles, and fish swim around Maisie’s face.

“Heehee.” She giggles. “Look Daddy, we are swimming.”

I laugh, too, because Maisie’s giggle is the sweetest sound I’ll ever hear. The screen changes and we become fruits, animals and clowns, until eventually Maisie turns us into princesses.

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