Page 60 of Because of Her

I immediately know I came on too strong, and I hate myself for it. Cassidy’s presence does something unnatural to my brain because it stops working whenever she is around. I should talk to her, before I jump headfirst into a relationship she isn’t ready for. Tell her the only reason she thinks we wouldn’t work is not enough to keep me from wanting her. Wanting us.

But the truth is, I am in too deep. I fell the moment I realised she lives across the hall, and I have no hope of finding my way out.

I’m terrified of Cassidy not feeling the same eventually, but I also know why she keeps teetering on the edge. It makes no sense to me that the best thing to ever come into my life, my daughter, is the one thing holding Cassidy back. But that’s how she feels and I have to respect that. All I can do is hope I can convince her to give me a chance.

“We’re done!” she calls as she walks back inside, and I’m left standing alone on the balcony when Mrs Kelly comes out to thank me.

“She’ll get there,” she croaks, patting me on the shoulder.

I hope so.

CASSIDY

Maisie is still in her pyjamas when she slams her tiny fists on the door. Callum hangs back, inside his apartment.

“Will you come to the park with us?”

“There’s a café there, we can get coffee.”

Callum’s addition was just what I needed to make my decision. Sadly, or maybe worryingly, I have nothing better to do on my Sunday. And with Amira working an early shift, all I’ve had this morning is my dirt flavoured coffee. I don’t know what I do wrong with our little machine, but I couldn’t even get through the whole cup.

Despite Amira’s efforts to train me, I haven’t been able to make a decent coffee. Our new machine will be delivered tomorrow, and I have a week to figure out how to make a coffee worth five bucks. I’m hoping the fancy machine is the magic wand I need. If not, I hope Madison can handle a few extra shifts so Amira doesn’t have to work seven days a week.

I grab my bag and coat, leaning down to Maisie’s level.

“Think your daddy will buy me a coffee if I come?”

She throws her arms around me giggling.

“Come on, Maisie.” Callum guides his daughter toward her bedroom. On the table, an empty backpack sits surrounded by supplies.

Drink bottle, snack box, sunscreen, hat, spare pair of leggings and undies, allergy plan and medicine. It feels like a lot of stuff, but I’m not the parent here. I trust Callum’s judgement and start loading it all into the bag.

From the sound of toys being thrown around Maisie’s room, I figure they’ve had a rough morning. She squeals Taylor Swift at the top of her lungs, and while it was endearing at first, three mashed up songs in and I’m ready to put on my noise reducing headphones. And it’s only 9.30 a.m. If I become part of their lives—for real—how would we cope? How would I cope with the broken sleep and stolen mornings?

“I need copious amounts of coffee today.” Callum’s voice shocks me out of my daydream and I zip up Maisie’s bright pink backpack.

“I think I do, too.”

He yawns, shoving his knuckles in front of his face. “I’d even drink your dirt at this rate, Rogue. But Isobel said the café was good.”

“Safer to wait then, probably.”

As I tuck her drink bottle into the side pocket, Maisie’s tiny voice enters the kitchen a fraction before she does.

“What happens to my new clothes when I go back to Mummy’s for a week?”

Maisie has shuffled her way out of the room, dragging Pavlova behind her. She’s spent plenty of nights here, but Callum mentioned they were working towards full weeks.

Callum walks over to Maisie and squats down in front of her. “Well, if there are any you really like and want during the week you can bring them with you to Mummy’s. The rest I’ll wash so it’s all clean for when you come back.”

“Okay,” she says, but her downward expression and stooped posture give the impression she still isn’t certain about the whole situation.

“What if I don’t want something now, but I want it before I see you again?”

“Then Mummy can call me and I will bring it to you.”

Maisie fiddles with her doll’s hair. Callum pulls her hands into his own to calm her nerves. I don’t want to seem like I’meavesdropping, so I pick the bag off the counter and walk to leave it by the front door. These apartments are so small though, I still hear everything.

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