Page 65 of Another Constant

I removed the deep red, round cake plates from the oven and set them atop two cool, wet towels. Then I moved to the edge of the counter and continued stirring the melted cream cheese and powdered sugar together for my homemade icing. I made my own icing and shit for things like this because it allowed me to control the sugar content. That was necessary when it came to Aja because I hated to have her ass hopped up on sugar if I gave her a piece of cake before bed.

While I beat down the loose form of the cream cheese, my eyes scanned the words on the paper. As soon as I walked in the door I cracked that file on Memphis. June had gotten me everything I needed, from his address to even the times of his security’s shifts. What alderman needed security?A crooked one.His home address had been burned in my mind from the day Sora had this bright idea to find him when we were kids. Neither of us knew our father lived so close. Thinking back on that day made my circular motions quicker and more intense. Memphis cursed us out, asking us what the fuck we were doing at his house, treated us like shit. I never forgot that moment. So when I had my second run-in with him at fifteen, I beat his grown ass. Call it retribution, shit I didn’t know, but the state called it assault. I got a year, first offense, but he had friends in high places.

The sound of the overly whipped, custard textured icing brought my brain back to the present. I’d made a mess but also came to an agreement within myself that the last face Memphis would see was mine.

“Pretty sure you beat all the air bubbles out of that icing. Now would you like to talk about it?”

“Nope.”

“Well I need you to talk about it because I’m worried about you.” She was standing on the side of me in seconds.

I set the bowl down and looked at her. Then I hoisted her up on the island. I pulled the spoon from the bowl and held it to her lips for her to taste. She welcomed it, eyes still stuck on me, urging me to talk. Anybody else I would have told to mind their fucking business, but her, I couldn’t.

“My father ain’t never been part of my life. Though we live in the same city and know one another exists, it hasn’t always been that way. I first met Memphis when I was a kid and he treated me and my brother like shit for coming to his home. Told us we were the ho’s sons. Then again when I beat his ass. He deserved it and pressed charges. After that I ain’t fuck with him, I promised my auntie I’d stay away from him. Then my shop gets raided and I hear I’m the name he’s giving up so he can get his name on the mayor's ballot. Then he came by the shop fucking with me and had niggas trying to pull me out.”

“So he’s messing with you?”

I squeezed her thigh. “I ain’t no victim, baby.”

“I didn’t say you were, but if somebody is messing with you, you have the right to react.”

I laughed. “You love me so much that you’d justify the fact that I’m a menace in these streets?”

“I didn’t think of it like that but I guess so. Yeah.”

“So you love me?” I asked, watching the way she squeezed her lips together, trapping the spoon between them.

“I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t disagree either.”

She just looked at me, those expressive honey-colored irises boring into mine for clarity. “You can’t distract me with talk of love just to get out of telling me how you feel, Kinga.”

I chuckled, stepping between her legs. “I ain’t tryna distract you. Either you love me or you don't, that's simple.”

She sat back on her hands, feet swinging back and forth. “Yes. I do. I just don’t want to feel like we’re rushing anything becau?—”

“The fuck we gonna rush for? We’re moving at our pace, the one perfect for me and you. If it makes you feel any better, I ain’t never felt the way I feel for you about anybody.”

“So that means you don’t know how you feel about me.” That smile disappeared and she appeared almost sad at the thought.

“Nah, I love you. Shit probably too much, but I do.”

She tilted her head to the side. “How can you know you love me too much?”

“Because I do. Every experience I’ve had with you has differed from every experience I’ve ever had with anybody else. Never wanted to be in nobody’s space as much as I wanna be in yours. Shit’s our space at this point.”

She grinned. “You don’t even like people, baby.”

“You're right but I like and love your ass, so get used to it.” I took the spoon from her and tossed it into the sink.

“I will. Now… are you gonna tell me how you’re gonna deal with Memphis?” she questioned.

“Nope, but best believe I’ma get his ass out the way.” I turned back around and faced her with a big, dumbass grin of my own on my face.

“Um, okay.”

“You trust me?”

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