Page 65 of Phixmery

I come to a halt, and Nero glides down off my shoulder to greet the older female, who coos and gently strokes his plumage. “I have an interesting question that I can’t seem to find any answers for here.”

She glances up, a curious glint entering her silver eyes. “And what would that be?”

I force myself from shuffling nervously and instead blurt it out, not the whole truth but a twisted version of it to make it seem more innocent and less conspicuous. “Well, we’re fighting a war against Vathia, home of the Skuggi fae. So why can’t I find anything on their magick and how to counter it or fight against it? It seems odd that at a military academy, we wouldn’t have that information to study.”

She hums, tapping her nails along the desk. “It’s normal for first years to get curious about that. To be honest, I’m not sure why the Lords forbid the information to be public. But I can tell you what little we do know. It’s usually taught in your third year before you begin going on smaller missions, so I don’t see the harm in sharing this information with you.” She smiles softly. “After getting to know you two, I know you have good hearts and wouldn’t use knowledge callously.”

After getting to know her this past year, I’ve discovered that she’s a stickler for rules and she is a big believer of knowledge being power. Most cadets come through here looking for ways to beat their opponents or to become more powerful without thinking of the consequences on others. Once you get past her cantankerous exterior, she’s quite kind.

“Is it that bad?”

She shakes her head at my question. “Nothing is ever good or bad, it just depends on how it’s used.” She gives me a look like I should already know this. “Skuggi fae have power over shadows and some even say dreams, although they’ve been pretty quiet with how it all works. They say that they use shadows to travel, that they can pull you in, twist your dreams into things of nightmares so brutal that you’ll die in your sleep.” She shrugs with a playful smile. “But the Skuggi I knew a long time ago were some of the kindest fae I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.”

My mouth hangs slightly ajar. Am I really capable of all that? I swallow. “How would an Elemi fae survive against that? How would any of us?”

She nods like it’s a perfectly reasonable question. “The fae of Vathia can only use their magick in the presence of shadows or darkness. I’m sure having the ability to wield flame would help. Would it not?” She raises a perfectly arched silver brow.

A soft chuckle leaves my lips. “Of course, how silly of me to forget that.”

“Is there anything else you wanted to know?” she asks.

Of course, I want to answer. How would I wield it, or stop it from appearing without practicing? But unfortunately I’ll have to find those answers far outside of Phixmery. “No, I think you’ve fixed my curiosity about the subject, thank you.”

“Well that was somehow both useful and useless at the same time,” Nero announces as he hops off her desk and lands back on my shoulder.

“Well it was something at least. We probably wouldn’t have even received that information from her if we didn’t spend all our time here,” I remind him before saying farewell to the librarian.

Just as I’m about to open the door to leave, someone pushes on it and I barely dodge out of the way.

“There you are. I thought I’d find you in here,” Bracken says as he holds the door open. “I wanted to apologize for my words earlier.”

My hand instantly lands on my fire starter and Nero caws in annoyance, his plumage puffing up as he hisses. “I’m not sure I want to talk to you right now, Bracken,” I start sourly.

“Or ever,” Nero adds.

My mood I’ve just barely got back under control comes to a boil again as I storm past him, determined to ignore his existence and hopefully work this rage off in the training yard. Maybe with a couple straw dummies on fire, or crushed between layers of earth. Yes, that sounds extremely satisfying right now.

“Ravina, wait!” he bellows, his boots thudding heavily against the stone floor as he catches up to me. He grabs my arm, forcing me to stop.

I shove him off me. “Don’t touch me.”

“Would you just listen for a moment? Please?” he asks, raking his fingers through his hair and pulling at the strands.

I wait, crossing my arms, twirling the striking stick around my fingers as a warning and then gesture for him to continue, not trusting my mouth.Only a week more to go after tonight… Only a week more to go.

“I just wanted to apologize for how it came out. I meant nothing about your scars. I know how strong you are. I was there for each and every one you received, remember? I made sure you were never alone.”

My eye twitches at the memory of him standing there like a coward while they mauled my flesh with iron, but he doesn’t notice as he pushes on.

“Verlice got that Scar because he’s a disgrace to his family. The only reason why he’s still heir to the Lord’s title is because he’s his father’s only son. It was basically the same thing as what you did to Cresida and her friend. Don’t you see? It was just a misunderstanding,” he explains triumphantly, like he didn’t just dig his own grave.

My power crackles inside me as wind whips around the hall and the water in the nearby fountain begins to bubble, spilling over the edge, coming towards us. Shadows dance at the corner of my eyes as I give into the wrath building in my veins. “You think I’m mad at you because of a misunderstanding? No. It’s because you’re a vain coward. Because you think you can push me around to—to what? Become my chosen mate? Let me spell it out for you very clearly: I’m not interested in you. At this point I don’t want to even be your friend. I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt, I really did. But to go after Verlice because you’re jealous he helped me after getting attacked?

“Where were you if you ‘cared’ about me? Huh? Why didn’t you stop anything that happened in Shalo? Stay the hell away from me, Bracken. Go crawl back to Cresida. You two belong together,” I snap, placing my hand against the wall and manipulating the stones under his feet to push him further away from me because if I touched him right now with how I’m feeling, I don’t think I’d be able to stop until he was dead, and I won’t have that on my conscience.

He gapes at me in awe as he glances around the hall. “You have all four elements.”

He takes a step towards me and his words sink in: the realization that I lost control. Panic digs into my throat, suffocating me.