Page 30 of Defying the Relic Hunter

“Oh hell! He’s gonna blow!” I took cover behind Ethan.

Buuuaaahhh. Adan spat out a goop-covered warrior. His skin was bright red and kinda melty looking. Big clumps of his hair were missing. A few green tattoos covered what was left of his face.“He is called Ulf. He is the commander of a Bjarke’s mercenary group called the Skadi.”

Zarek studied the pieces of melted flesh decorating his spiffy boots.

“Clean up on aisle four,” I muttered and linked mentally with Ethan.Can we leave? Zarek’s about to blow a gasket and we both need a shower.”

Ethan took one look at the moaning Bjarke, the gooey mess on the tarmac and nodded. “Do I have permission to take Kizzy to sick bay, my lord?”

“Tend to your female.”

Ethan wrapped an arm around me. Poof! We were in sick bay. I looked around the spotless room. Six top-of-the-line regen tubes lined the back wall. There were four examining tables with all sorts of thingamabobs to ensure a sterile operating field and enhanced diagnostics.

A soothing voice asked, “How may I assist you?”

“My mate needs treatment for heat exhaustion and dehydration.” Ethan placed me on an examining table.

“I’mnotyour mate.”

“Yes, you are.” Ethan gestured at his goo covered battle suit. “Only a mate would hold a woman who has been in contact with a dying Katanic.”

He had a point. Ethan’s battle suit was covered in green slime and he smelled as bad as I did.

The medic walked over to us and my jaw dropped. He had green skin, tubular ears and exotic features. He looked like the ogre in that vid. Except he was a lot smaller. “Holy hell. Don’t tell me. Let me guess. Your name is Shrek. Right?”

“It is.”

I broke into hysterical giggles. “I’m a Barbie. My doctor is an ogre. A drop dead gorgeous Coletti warrior wants to have hot, monkey sex with me. How crazy is that?”

“She rode the vortex,” Ethan explained.

“No, it was more like a F-5 tornado. I’m never, ever doing that again.”

Shrek ran a scanner over me. “You found Adan?”

“Yup. Some dudes with purple hair had him locked in a glass cage. I let him out and things got crazy.” I shuddered. “Starving a Katanic shapeshifter is never a good idea.”

Shrek and Ethan exchanged glances.

I rubbed my forehead. “Sorry, I’m still a bit freaked out.”

Ethan massaged my shoulders. “You have every right to be, sweetheart.”

“This will correct your metabolic imbalance.” Shrek placed a pressure injector against my neck and triggered it. “Have you taken your mate’s blood today?”

“I did and it tastes like shit.”

Shrek handed me a chocolate bar.

Giddy with glee, I ripped the wrapper off and practically inhaled the bar. “I think. I. Love you,” I said between bites.

Ethan swallowed hard. “How can you eat now?”

“Easy. You got anymore chocolate?”

“I do.” Shrek gave me another bar.

“Yum.” I gobbled it down.

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