Page 86 of Heart of the Sun

I bobbed my head, sliding up and down on his shaft faster and faster until he let out a growl and another thrust, pressing my shoulders so that my mouth disengaged with a pop. He had his head thrown back and he dug his fingers into my shoulders as he came, his abdominal muscles straining and tightening with each wave of pleasure.

Then his muscles went lax, and he sunk into the chair, bringing his hand to his hair as he raised his head. “My God. I told you,” he said, voice laced with a smidge of embarrassment. “I’m surprised it took that long.”

I breathed out a small laugh as I picked up his T-shirt and swiped it over his lower stomach. Then I leaned forward again,kissing the spot I’d just cleaned and dragging my lips around his naval.

“Earlier, when I mentioned that hayloft where you found peace, what were you thinking?” I propped my chin on his stomach and looked up at him. He still looked drugged and satisfied and very, very beautiful, candlelight caressing his features in both shadows and highlights.

“How do you know I was thinking anything?”

“Because I know your expressions, Tuck.” I ran my short fingernails over his hip and felt the beginnings of another erection stir at my breasts. His eyes went sort of dreamy as he looked down at me. “Even now. I know when you’re keeping secrets.”

I brought my other hand to the opposite hip and scraped my fingernails over his skin and then leaned up slightly so I could do the same to his inner thighs. I watched as he stiffened into an erection again even though the evidence of his recent orgasm was still drying on his lower stomach. I wrapped my hand around him, and he let out a hum. “Tell me,” I cajoled, giving a slow stroke.

“Oh God, Em. Uh, I was thinking about how you always liked to disturb my peace. A lifetime thorn in my side.” He smiled but it was fleeting. When he met my eyes, I saw the earnestness in his expression. “I never could dig you out. Time hasn’t changed that, and I don’t have any desire to try.”

My heart gave a kick.Tuck.He could be so sweet when he wanted to be. And oh I loved hearing his secrets.

He put his hand on mine and forced me to halt midstroke. He began to sit up, his stomach muscles bunching. “And do you want to know what I’m thinking now?”

A thrill whirled through me. “Yes.”

“I’m thinking that if I don’t get inside you, I might die, and there’s a bed right behind us and I mean to make use of it. Is that okay with you?”

My mouth went dry, nipples pebbling, and all I could do was nod.His eyes moved lazily to my chest and stayed there for a moment. And then he stood up, pulling me to my feet as he walked me backward, both of us laughing as we tumbled down.

chapterthirty-five

Tuck

I hadn’t known lust like this. I tried to tell myself the arousal coiled around my muscles and pumping through my veins was only natural considering how long I’d been celibate, but I knew very well that was a lie. Sure, that was part of it. But mostly, it was her. No one got me going like Emily. No one brought out my emotions like her. No one else both pressed my buttons and turned me on. No one stirred my soul like the woman beneath me. I wanted her desperately. But I also needed to keep her safe. “Before this goes too far… I need to check for condoms.”

“I have an IUD,” she murmured. And then she pressed against my aching erection, now standing at attention even though I’d climaxed not five minutes before.

I swallowed back a moan. And the knowledge that I didn’t have to worry about coming inside her sent a bolt of excitement through my body. But I took a breath. I didn’t want this to end too soon. Somewhere beyond the lust was this vague fear that we were on borrowed time.Like a shooting star speeding through the galaxy—hot and dazzling—but destined to burn out. Something told me I needed to relish every blazing moment. I barely wanted to blink. I breathed her in as I kissed down her throat, the moment slowing, her muscles softening beneath me.

“It was always leading here with us, wasn’t it?” she asked breathily, her words slurred with passion.

I nuzzled her neck, rubbing my lips over her skin as I brought my hand under her T-shirt and cupped her breast. She moaned softly when I began rubbing my thumb over her nipple.It was always leading here.And I knew she didn’t mean to this ranch house at the end of the world, but here,us, limbs wrapped, mouths melded, moving together.

“Yes,” I confirmed. “Always.”

I pulled her T-shirt over her head, and then stared down at her naked breasts, shimmering in the candlelight. When I met her eyes, they were tender, her lips curved as she watched me, obviously pleased by what she saw on my face.It was always leading here. Yes.The phrase repeated, pounding through my blood. I felt the truth of it to my soul. And you couldn’t fight fate. We’d tried, hadn’t we? And yet here we were.Alwaysmeant always.

Emily was still looking at me, and I wondered if she too was having a hard time closing her eyes, needing instead to witness every second of this long-awaited moment.Keep your eyes open, my heart whispered.You’ve missed far too much already.“God you’re stunning, Em.” I wanted her to know that, to feel it. To understand that to me, there was no one more beautiful than her. There never had been. That truth had haunted me, even if I hadn’t admitted it to myself. But now it brought nothing but joy.

Her smile melted into a sigh as I lowered my face and licked at her nipple. I worshipped her breasts for long minutes as her pants grew louder and her hips came up off the bed,her core seeking mine. She ran her hands through my hair, her short nails scoring along my scalp.

“And you light me on fire,” I grated. Sometimes my instinct was to draw away from the burn, but fuck I craved it too. I was hot and throbbing again, desperate to feel her clasped around me, to make her mine.Finally.

That fate again, pulling, driving my need.

This—us—could only be destiny. It felt so damn right. A certainty, but also a return of some sort, a rewind that I’d never imagined was possible. How many times had I wished I could go back to those bright, beautiful days with her when life made perfect sense? It felt like I’d somehow miraculously managed to do that, even if this was the future, not the past, an astonishing paradox of time.

Our eyes met and held, expressions becoming serious as if we both suddenly sensed the intense gravity of this moment. I knew I did. And though the paradox was miraculous, it was also startling. And scary too because it demanded a surrender, and lowering my guard had never been a strong suit of mine. I felt a strange tumbling, a reeling inside as though I’d both snapped back into place and found myself in a distant land. I let out a breath and gripped her, her eyes softening as she gripped me back. The next kiss was slow and long, our mouths and tongues exploring leisurely even as my blood pumped swiftly and my heart quickened. I needed it, the pause, the anchor that was her mouth and her hands and the soft press of her skin. Needed to come to terms with this dreamlike reality after weeks of fear and hardship where hypervigilance was a necessity. Relearning how to sink into a moment and get lost in this newfound pleasure.

She met my eyes again, searching them before she smiled and flipped me over. I laughed with shocked surprise before she leaned up, a wicked smile tilting her lips. She took my hands and held them over my head. “Say uncle,” she said.

I laughed again. She’d known. She’d seen me overthinking, even here, even now, and she’d quickly put an end to that. “Never.”