I’m only halfway across the lawn when I hear his front door open.
“Hallie,” he calls out.
Turning back, I find Rio jogging to me, meeting me in the center point between our houses, the way we always used to.
“Hey,” he says, rubbing his eyes. “What happened?”
“The kids all got picked up, and you were asleep. I didn’t want to wake you.”
“When did I...” He looks around, clearly out of it. “When did I pass out?”
“About halfway through the movie.”
“Wow.” He inhales deeply, stretching out his back. “Sorry about that.”
“Your friends are nice.”
“Yeah. They’re good people. I got lucky when I moved here, finding that group.”
I give him a soft smile. “Well, goodnight. I hope you have a good road trip.”
Turning back to my house, I only make it one step before he circles my bicep with his hand and swings me back in his direction, pulling me into his chest.
Rio wraps himself around me in a hug that’s firm and comforting and desperate. His arms are crossed around the back of my neck, his face is buried into my hair.
It’s the first time we’ve hugged since seeing each other again, and with my nose buried in his chest, I can’t help but take a dragging inhale. He smells like him. The old him. Because this man is still that same boy I once loved.
Closing my eyes, I fall into him, wrapping my arms around his waist, and we just hold each other.
Outside, standing between our houses, we hold each other longer than friends should. We hold each other longer than two people who claim to still be hurt by each other should.
Rio takes a deep, centering breath. “I missed you, Hallie,” he whispers into my hair.
I close my eyes even tighter, pressing my face further into his chest. It both aches and fills me with relief to hear those words. Because I feel the exact same way and it’s been that way every day for the past six years.
Eventually, his arms uncross before his palms slide against my cheeks, simultaneously pulling my face away from his chest. Craning his neck, he rests his forehead against mine, his labored breaths blending with my own.
So close. He’s so close. Ourlipsare so close.
We watch each other for a long moment before I use my tongue to wet my lips. I haven’t kissed this man in six years, but it feels like that could change in an instant if Rio decides to shift forward and take what I know he wants.
When he nudges his nose against mine, his lips slightly brush my own, but he doesn’t kiss me yet. He teases. He silently asks for permission.
“Hallie,” he whispers against my mouth. It comes out pained yet urgent, as if there’s more he wants to say but doesn’t.
Like he’s begging and apologizing all at the same time.
Still he doesn’t go in for the kiss. Instead, his thumbs stroke against my cheekbones as he waits for me to decide whether I’m going to close the remaining distance and meet his mouth with my own or stop this altogether.
But alarms are going off in my head. Alarms telling me to pull back and create distance. Alarms telling me that we wouldn’t be able to come back from this. Alarms reminding me that though we’re getting along again, I’m not ready to forgive or forget about the day he left or the painful years after. And I don’t think he is either.
This kiss would only make my job ten times harder. This would only make mylifeten times harder because this wouldn’t just be a simple kiss for me. Not with him.
As much as every other part of me wants to lean up, my brain doesn’t let me.
“I’m glad we’re able to be friends,” I whisper against him instead.
Rio’s mouth instantly turns up in a smile and his chest slightly shakes against mine with a laugh. Those lips that were about to press against my own, move to my forehead, placing a kiss there instead.