Mybirthday. March eighth. Thirty-eight.
He’s been wearing my birthdate on his jersey for six years and I had no idea.
He slowly turns over his shoulder to look at me.
I lean my chin on my arm that’s resting on him, a painfully big smile on my mouth. “So, you likereallylike me, huh?” I tease quietly for only him to hear.
“I think we both know it’s a little deeper than that, even if we’re still pretending it’s one of those unspoken things.” He turns to press a quick kiss to my lips. “And I have for fifteen years, Hal. You’ve had me hooked since the day you became the girl next door.”
I drop the last dirty dish by the sink while Ryan finishes washing them.
Isaiah is cleaning up the table, Kennedy is putting the leftovers in Tupperware, and Kai, Miller, Stevie, and Zanders are grabbing their sleeping kids from upstairs to take them home.
It’s getting late and we’re all ready to go, so I sneak away to Indy’s home office where I hung my coat in the closet when I first got here, but when I get to the office door, I find it locked.
I’m about to go ask Ryan if I could get in there when I hear Rio’s voice coming from inside the room.
“I’m going to sign.”
“You are?” I hear Indy ask, but I don’t know how to read the tone. Is she surprised, or is she simply agreeing with him?
“But I don’t know how I’m going to tell her.” There’s an edge of panic in Rio’s tone. “How is she supposed to come visit? My mom refuses to even let metalkabout Hallie, and I’m supposed to assume they’ll be able to be in the same room?”
My stomach drops.
It’s not hearing that he’s going to sign with his hometown team that makes me feel sick. I’ve known that for a while. But instead, it’s the confirmation that his mother’s disdain for me has been eating away at him as I suspected it was.
“It’ll work itself out,” Indy tries to soothe.
“It’s not that simple, Ind. It’s actually very fucking complicated. I can’t give you all the details of why that is but trust me. The history between them is not some kind of small misunderstanding that will go away on its own.”
He’s right about that. Our situation is nuanced. Only he and I will ever fully understand.
“Rio, you have to do what’s best for you.”
“I know.” There’s a long pause. “But it makes me sick to think that for the rest of my life my mom isn’t going to approve of the woman I love. How the fuck am I supposed to be okay with that, Indy?”
I walk away before she responds because I shouldn’t be a part of this conversation.
I create as much distance as possible between me and the door as I listen to my pounding heart in my ears. And not because Rio just admitted that he loves me. I already knew that too. My heart is racing because he’s right.
Heshouldn’tbe okay with his mother not liking the woman he’s with. And I know with every fiber of my being that I can no longer be that woman.
That realization is so painful that I think I’m going to be sick.
I just... I don’t know how I could even get the words out. The thought of that conversation, which is one I believed I’d never have to have, makes me physically ill. Not to mention, how will I ever find even courage to do what I know has to be done?
Rio’s mom is his only family. He loves her the same way I love my dad, and I won’t be the reason that relationship falls apart.
I refuse to be.
Chapter 39
Rio
“Thanks, man,” I say to the rideshare driver as he drops me off at the airport. “Appreciate it.”
Grabbing my bag, I head inside the Montréal airport.