Page 82 of Savage Daddies

Sammy nods her head.

“Want us to tuck you in?”

Another head nod.

“Alright.” I squeeze Sammy’s hand, and all three of us walk to her room. A night-light glows from the wall outlet, shining pink light out into the room. It smells good too, the room, of roses or something. I realize why when I see a bunch of pink ones bunched together in a glass by the dresser.

Wrangler lifts her back into the bed, and her tiny hands bring the blanket all the way up over her face.

“Careful, sweetness.” I lower the blanket slightly. “You’ll suffocate.”

“I like hiding.”

Wrangler and I share a look.

“OK!” I smile. “How about this? Just under your nose.” I demonstrate. This time she allows me to lower the sheet. Her cute nose and ice-blue eyes are like a dagger to my heart.

I studied for a teaching qualification so I could ramble on about literature all day, but the work ended up introducing me to a new passion. Seeing kids progress swelled my chest with pride. The kind that money can’t buy, and the kind I feel Felix could never understand. The job itself got repetitive, and helping others day to day causes you to lose touch with yourself.

I don’t regret leaving, but Idomiss having something to work for. Making a difference. The last day before summer always brought bittersweet feelings as I waved goodbye to the kids I brought up for four years. You get attached and become fond of them, and then they go. It’s a sad feeling, but also the best. You bring them up, and then watch them to go on and do great things.

I always thought four years was too short.

But what about a whole lifetime?

From three to eighteen?

“Can you come again?” Sammy asks.

It’s like the wind has whistled the most pleasant song into my ears.

Wrangler elbows my side, smiling.

“Uh. We will try our best, darling.” I rake my hand through her red hair.

“Please?” Her eyes are closed at this point, her voice barely above a whisper.

I continue stroking her hair, and she drifts off to sleep.

Nothing comes close to two people in love sharing a child. Owning something that’s both equally yours and theirs…nothing greater tops it, and there’s no word powerful enough to describe the feeling.

If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more…

Having a child isn’t the same as “owning,” though.

If the inkling is right, if Sammy truly ismydaughter, then I treat her not as property, but as her own individual. Mom single-parented me into this world, and she did a damn good job of it, always encouraging me to shape my own path because the “journey is always the best part.”

Sammy needs room to understand herself. To figure out her own path in this world.

Soon, she’ll be sucked into Felix’s world and she won’t know how to get out.

It’s crucial we get back Zoe’s spark, and guide Sammy to find hers.

A crashing sound downstairs disrupts me from my thoughts.

Sammy doesn’t wake.

But excruciating fear rises in my chest…

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