Page 36 of Broken Rules

“It’s probably nothing,” she insisted.

When was she going to stop trying to comfort me?“Babe, I’m serious.It’s fine.”

I was grateful my phone buzzed with a call.Instead of letting her answer it, I did once I saw who was calling.He would want to talk to me, after all.

The second I answered, Lex blurted out, “It’s nothing.I have no idea what this is supposed to be about.”

I tried to ignore my relief as I walked the set, adjusting props for lack of anything better to do with my hands and the anxious energy flowing through them.Why was I anxious?I knew he was telling the truth.It was the way he called me immediately that lessened the tension and eased the ache in my heart.“Hey, there’s no such thing as bad publicity, right?”I asked with an empty laugh as I watched the cast and crew wrap up their lunch break.

“Only if it’s not a bunch of blatantly made-up bullshit.Which it is.I don’t know who the hell these assholes think they are, but they’re gonna get a call from our legal department.”I saw him in my head, pacing his office only yards from where I stood on the soundstage.

Was he sincere?Or was he going overboard trying to prove his innocence?Usually when people did that, they were guilty.

“It’s not all that harmful, though, is it?”I pointed out.“Not that I’m trying to tell you what to do or anything.Whatever you think has to be done.”

He paused for a long beat.“You sure you’re all right?You seem detached.”

“Honestly, there’s a lot to finish today, and I’m a little overwhelmed.”That sounded true enough.

He was right.I was detached.There was nothing to attach myself to.We weren’t together.We were not a couple.The world would never know about us.

But dammit, it would be too easy for everybody to find out, wouldn’t it?That was the problem.There were people outside those gates all the time, sometimes blending in with the rest of the world, sometimes not, always looking to get an edge on their competition.To sell a great photo that would grab attention and spark theories and gossip.

It’d be so easy for that photo to include me unless I was extremely careful.All it would take was getting a little too close to Lex in public, and all of a sudden, I would be in the middle of a love triangle.Something twisted like that.

At the end of the day, this film would eventually wrap, and I’d have to continue with my life.There were no guarantees.

“A long day deserves a little fun in the evening.”Right on schedule, Lex’s voice deepened, heavy with intimacy.“How about you go for a long swim in my pool before I treat you to a massage?”

That sounded nice.Too nice.And it would’ve felt so good to give in because, in the end, that was exactly what I wanted—a night with him, just the two of us.The rest of the world could be left behind for a little while.I didn’t have much more time with him.

But it would always be this way, even if we decided to give ‘us’ a try for real.The paparazzi would always be just outside the gate, waiting for one of us to take the wrong step.Because Danica and Lex weren’t actual people to the public.They were fodder, a commodity.

And there I was, hoping to make a name for myself in the same town.

“You know what?I think tonight is girls’ night.”Lowering my voice like I was telling a secret, I added, “I haven’t been spending a lot of time with Claudia lately.I think she’s a little lonely.”

Was that true?Not really.I did feel like I was neglecting our friendship a little, but she was making friendsandgoing out sometimes to dinners or clubs.She wasn’t sitting around waiting for me to give her something to do in her downtime.

But I had already gone too far with him.It was obvious.That stab of pain when I saw them together in that photo made everything clear.I had to start thinking for myself again, which meant ignoring my body’s needs for a little while, no matter how demanding it was.

“Are you sure you’re not pissed?”he asked.

“Why would I be?Like you said, it was nothing.Besides, I wouldn’t have any right to get all up in my feelings.”

Silence.The kind that only lasted a second or two but felt much, much longer.“Yeah.I see what you mean.I hope the afternoon goes well.”

“Thanks.”That wasn’t the most awkward conversation in history or anything.It definitely wasn’t the most satisfying.I had no right to expect him to give me the answer I now knew I wanted.That I would have a reason to be hurt or offended if he was screwing around with Danica or any other woman.

A girls’ night was definitely what the doctor ordered.The more time I spent away from Lex, the safer I’d be.

15

LEX

The son of a bitch.

The stupid, pedestrian son of a bitch.

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