Page 47 of Iron Unicorn

“I’m not sure which is worse, honestly.” Carl went over to one of the larger tubs, talked to one of the women there, and after a moment, she cracked up laughing, dunked both her hands into the water, and hauled out the largest damned lobster I’d ever seen in my life.

Before I had a chance to sit down, protest, or even remember things with ten or more legs scared the shit out of me, she thrust the entire wiggling thing into my arms.

My fear of hurting the lobster, which would be my queen’s treasured pet given a single look at it, overrode my desire to flee the entire kingdom of Texas while screaming. In good news for me, outside of a single flip of its tail, it stayed mostly still.

Its eye stalks, however, wiggled this way and that.

The woman adjusted my hold on it. “I’ve done the equivalent of make him high so he doesn’t mind you holding him in the slightest. This beauty weighs in at thirty pounds, and we estimate he’s at least a hundred years old. His lady rings in at twenty-two pounds, and she’s probably a hundred years old, too. They’re the same species, so with luck, they’ll reproduce in captivity and we’ll be able to release their young into the wild.”

Had the thirty pound lobster decided to move, he would have hit the floor, and I would have been upset for more than a few reasons. “Olivia, he’s touching me,” I whispered, my voice strained.

The princess snickered and came to my rescue, taking the lobster out of my arms and hauling him over her shoulder. “That’s a good boy. Let’s put you back in your bin so you can get ready to go to New York.”

I shuddered, especially as the lobster insisted on waving its eye stalks around.

With help from the woman, Olivia returned the lobster to its holding cell.

Then, to my horror, the pair went for the container with the king crabs. The women donned thick leather gloves and plucked out a pair of the crabs. Rather than run like I wanted, I braced, forcing myself to take long, deep breaths.

They took their sweet time talking about the demonic sea creatures, and Olivia put hers back into the tub before selecting a different one.

To my dismay, her second catch was larger than her first.

“You’ll be all right, Terry,” Carl stated, and I recognized he had shifted to using the tone we tended to adopt to keep someone from panicking. “You handled the lobster just fine, and he had ten legs.”

“Those legs are a lot longer.”

“That they are.” Carl came to my side and patted my shoulder. “Before you flee for some other kingdom, the princess wants to devour these things for scaring you tonight. You’re picking your conquest. You get to eat it for it scaring the liver out of you.”

“That woman didn’t give me enough time to react before I had to keep my queen’s new pet from hitting the concrete.”

“She would have caught her charge if you had fainted or dropped him, I’m sure. Keep breathing. Just touch it with a finger, and you meet the basic requirements and will dodge additional torture.”

“At least you recognize this is torture. It’s self-inflicted this time, too. I decided to walk in here of my own volition. I think I need a psychological evaluation, Carl.”

“I think you need some quiet time with your woman, who has had almost as rough of a day as you have. I can verify that she is definitely receiving through the bond, and once your end opens up, you’re going to be in for a rough ride. We were monitoring her the whole time, and we were able to time her reactions based on your situation. We had her a solid thirty miles away when we opened the show. We will not be doing a stress test to determine her range, but she might have a mutated talent. She was able to pinpoint your location with relative ease. That’s unusual in partially developed bonds. Perhaps a flameweaving talent?”

“The Montana line has a lot of talent mixes, and they’re notorious for developing abilities based on their partner,” I replied, sighing at the thought of the princess also being a progenitor. “You’ll have to contact Montana to find out if there’s a history. I don’t know of anyone with that variety of talent, however. I don’t think the Montana line has crossed with the Nevada line.”

“We’ll contact Montana once the monarchs clear us to involve His Royal Majesty. We want to officiate your bond first.”

The women finished their conversation and approached. Olivia held up her crab like it was the prize of her life. “I have chosen this one as your dinner, Terry.”

My dinner had legs the length of my arm, spikes on its body, and bubbles frothed out of what I was assumed was its mouth. My stint bound to a chair in a sea filled with wretched crabs had done me some good. Rather than fight a desire to flee from the warehouse and run risk of a heart attack, I dealt with a hefty dose of disgust. “It looks like a spider from some depths of a watery hell.”

“You don’t mind spiders. Just think of it as a mutant spider. It can’t even pinch you because of the bands.” Olivia held the crab closer. “Go on. Touch it!”

“The fact you are wearing thick gloves is an indication that this thing should be thrown into a pot of boiling water and eradicated from existence.”

The woman in charge of the various crustaceans laughed. “Well, at least he understands that part of his relationship with the crab. We’re wearing gloves because these bastards have spikes everywhere. They aren’t allthatsharp, but they’re sharp enough.”

As Olivia would chase me for the laughs if I didn’t give her what she wanted, I braced, stretched out my hand, and touched the crab’s claw where the band kept it closed. As I didn’t want to find out if it could bust free, I then retreated. “That better be close enough.”

Carl snickered. “Just give it to him, Olivia. He was brave—and he legitimately held the lobster.”

“I’m going to have nightmares over that,” I warned him. “Any RPS agents nearby are going to be jumping out of their skin when they hear me scream in the middle of the night.”

According to the man’s expression, he did not believe me. “You do not seem to be the type to do any such thing. Even when you were fevered to the point of incoherency, you did not indulge in such behaviors.”