Page 82 of Trickster King

Epilogue: “What is even going on here?”

A week after my wife returned to work, I headed home. During the rest of my time off, I bought Eddie a new bedroom set and confirmed we wouldn’t be losing any of the rescues. I drove to the palace in my new car, a cherry red beauty of a vehicle. It had cost me a small fortune, but I’d paid for it using the gold I’d found.

I accepted the cost with a disturbing amount of glee.

Maybe the car wasn’t a horse, but the RPS let me drive it unattended. They’d tipped the wife off to my trickster ways, planning everything so she was coming down the steps when I pulled up. I put the car in park, reached over, and shoved the passenger side open. “Get in. We’re busting this joint.”

Jessica laughed, did as told, and closed the door before buckling in. “What is even going on here?”

“This is our new car, and we have a dinner date.” As I’d loved the steakhouse Eddie had picked, I wanted the wife to experience it—and I’d worked with my therapist to make sure I could take her out to dinner without having a fit of anxiety. “I have been tasked to show you that I can drive like a proper Texan for a change.” I gave the steering wheel of my car a fond pat. “I need a name for him.”

Jessica checked the back to discover I’d gotten a two-seater. “You bought a car?”

“With the gold money. It is seed gold, and as I drove a trailer without incident, I thought I deserved an upgrade.”

My wife laughed. “You tricked me again!”

I had. “I didn’t even need to go to the RPS clinic, although I’m booked in for a visit this week. Nobody believes I managed to fall into two holes, rescue horses, and do everything I’ve done recently without killing my back. You owe me, Your Majesty.”

As I didn’t want my trip revoked due to bad behavior, I gave the RPS agents a chance to settle, handle their shift swap, and prepare to deal with me driving faster than they liked so I could have a proper date with my wife.

Jessica giggled, and she introduced herself to the vehicle’s navigation pane. “Where are we going?”

“I am taking you to a location where we will be wined and dined. I have selected a restaurant I enjoy. I think I should be rewarded with one cow for stepping outside of my comfort zone.”

With wide eyes, my wife stared at me. “You planned a date for us at a restaurant?”

“When I called the restaurant personally, Randy appeared like he might faint. My other agents had to sit down. I placed the reservation for eight. The restaurant closes at ten.”

She checked her watch. “It’s not even noon yet, Pat.”

“We’re going to eat fast food on the way. I’ve been told I’m not allowed to eat while I’m driving, so we’re going to dine in there, too. And we aren’t going to shut the joint down. The agents are going to have lunch, and we’re going to terrorize the staff with a large group.” As I was rather proud of myself, I plugged my new phone into my car and pulled up the directions to Senator Padrino’s ranch. “You didn’t get to meet my Akhal-Tekes, so we will be making a stop so I can introduce you to them. Eddie’s gelding came over yesterday and he got the bright idea to introduce his horse to the Akhal-Tekes. One of the stallions has been charmed, so I’m afraid Eddie has a stallion now. In good news, the stallion can be broken to saddle already, he’s a gentleman, and I won’t have much trouble gentling him. Black Sand has a new best friend.”

“Black Sand was ready for transport already?”

“Yep. I’ll be driving the trailer to move Black Sand and the stallion to the royal stables tomorrow. It’s a four hour drive. You get to accompany us in this beauty. Charlie wants me to get more driving practice in with the truck and trailer. I could have done better, babe.”

Jessica laughed at that. “Unbelievable. The RPS was awed over your conversion into a proper Texan, and Charlie thinks you could have done better?”

“I was hesitant at the auction barn. Jerrod’s rig is bigger. And I need trailers like that for my horses.”

“Having looked into Jerrod’s trailer, you can’t have that specific one. The doors aren’t wide enough; I don’t like the risk of injury. While you had no problems with the rescues, it could be an issue. However, I’ve put in an order for a twenty horse trailer of the same length with wider side doors. I also have an order in for a six horse and a four horse trailer for you. The four horse trailer is your new rescue trailer.”

I regarded my wife with wide eyes. “You’re giving me a rescue trailer?”

“Yep. It will have doors on all sides, a seat legal for royalty in the trailer itself with belts and safety harness, and it is rear facing. There will be a sling assembly for all stalls. There is also a section for a medical kit, a locking pistol box, and a sedation kit in a locking box. There will be enough sedative to euthanize if necessary.”

Knowing I might not need to shoot a horse to put it out of its misery appealed. “This implies that you’re going to let me rescue more horses.”

“I’m impressed that you truly think I have the ability to stop you once you get it into your head to rescue animals.” She twisted in her seat to glance in the direction of the palace, where RPS agents loitered and prepared for our journey. “You really arranged all this?”

“I did. I’ve been working on it all week. I scored major points with the RPS because I told them to pick the vehicle. Charlie made certain to give me something fun, and we’ll use it in my lessons—although not for the higher end stunts. I’d cry if we totaled it.”

To date, I had totaled six vehicles in my driving lessons. Charlie still questioned how I’d managed to drop out the axle on the one car doing the spins as he’d directed. The vehicle had been completely dismantled to uncover a manufacturing flaw.

The rest had been accidents involving the car’s tail end and solid objects during spin and evasion maneuvers.

“The food-thieving tyrants approve of your trickery,” my wife announced. “You may proceed with minimal caution.”

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