Page 24 of Trickster King

I grinned. “I don’t want all those RPS agents sneakin’ around here to be cranky with me for a change.”

“It might be a miracle,” Geoff muttered.

“Don’t get your hopes up it’ll last, Geoff. I just need help driving the trailers.”

Between Randy and Geoff, they’d acquired twelve trucks and trailers for our use and summoned most of Eddie’s mothers to help with the transport of animals. In an upset Geoff and Randy would eventually forgive me over, I called my favorite truck dealership, asked for their three biggest trucks on the lot that could handle cattle and horse trailers, and bought them. Then I called my favorite trailer dealership and bought my wife three new horse trailers she’d love. They would get their special modifications after my plan.

Then, as I had a mean streak a mile wide, I had Eddie’s mothers call in for trustworthy backup to help drive the extra trailers.

Once I had sufficient drivers, I made a call to the one man I knew had a ranch with fallow pastures, four of them.

Senator Padrino answered on my third ring and said, “Good evening, Your Majesty. How can I help you?”

“Do you still have that ranch with the four fallow pastures north of Dallas?”

“Six now, but yes. Why?”

“The wife has dictated my ranch is being razed and redone, and I need to move my cattle. I’ve got the trailers, but I need a spot to put my cattle for a few weeks.”

“Bring them over. I’ll warn the ranch hands they’ll have work and some help. Everyone’s bored because I overhauled my operations and was going to get new stock next year for that ranch, and I kept everyone employed. You’re sending your crew over?”

“Sure am. Still got your genetically clean cows?”

“I’ve some, yes. I unloaded most of mine to the meat market; the dairy cattle were older stock, and I stopped breeding to keep after their genetic tests came back as bad as they were. The diverse cows I kept.”

“Pregnant?”

“No.”

“Leave them in one of the pastures. I’m setting my bulls loose to enjoy some time with the ladies.”

“Your good bulls?”

“My good bulls.”

“Is Bullmanchu offering his services?”

I chuckled. “He got a bath today, antifungal treatments, and is stalled in my barn while we’re arranging housing.”

“I’ll make sure my cows are tagged clearly so we can separate them out when you come to retrieve your cattle. Good to hear about the field razing. You’d mentioned wanting to do it, but money’s a problem with a ranch of your size.”

I grinned, as my wife had assigned the senator to be one of my babysitters when she couldn’t attend congress sessions and I had yet another infection. At a single gesture from him, the session would be delayed so I could be given a break to mitigate risk of setback. Overall, the arrangement had worked well. “I found an eloquent solution. Also, don’t tell the wife this, but I just bought her three new trucks and trailers for her enjoyment. The trailers were her wish list trailers.”

“And to think as I’d actually started to like you, you’re going to die at the hands of your pregnant wife. A pity.”

I snickered at the senator’s commentary. “I sold a bunch of my rescues, so they’re cash payouts from my cattle account. I needed the trailers to move the cattle, and the payout covered the fields and the vehicles. She might be proud of me for a change.”

“When isn’t she proud of you?”

“Whenever I do something she doesn’t want comes to mind. That’s fairly often, but it’s a price I’m willing to pay.”

“Along with being her personal slave for the duration of her pregnancy. Rumor on the grapevine has it there’s more than one?”

“Twins,” I confirmed. “I’ll start getting this show on the road. With fifteen trailers, we can have most of the cattle moved today.”

“I’ve been using that ranch to store my cattle transports. I’ve got five, and they can handle full loads, and the drivers for them are in residence. Move the prized cattle in your wife’s trailers but leave the mass hauling to me. We can get your whole herd moved today with a little work. Why are you at your ranch today? It wasn’t on the schedule.”

“My boy’s not feeling well, so I called dibs to get him from school. He’s a budding empath, and it was a no-call window with the school. He’ll get a few weeks at home before we send him back, and we’ll have the empathy rules in place. So, no worries, but if you could nudge one of your kids to check in with him, that’d be ideal.”