Page 17 of Trickster King

“Buy three extras, give one a unique number, and tell her that one is so she can talk to me and me alone. There’s no reason to keep sending you all out several times a week because the New Yorkers got on her last nerve again.”

Avery chuckled. “Of course, Your Majesty.” He paused before saying, “Your Majesty, your husband is on the phone for you.”

Within five seconds, my wife barked, “What’s wrong?”

“Simmer down there, babe,” I replied, grinning at my wife’s alarmed tone. “The poor baby is just tired, but he’s demonstrating empathy symptoms. It’s a no-call period at the school. I invoked the empathy clause, and we’ll have him for two to three weeks. There’s no reason to panic, but I won’t be coming home tonight for certain. He needs to settle and rest, and he’s overdue for some peace and quiet.”

I trusted my wife to read between the lines. Sure enough, after a few moments, she said, “Stay over tomorrow, too, and I’ll keep the herd controlled while you’re gone. If he’s tired and needs quiet, the ranch is better, and if I bring the herd over, there will be no peace nor quiet for him.”

“I’ll do that. He’ll be fine, but he’s not feeling great, so I’ll cook him soup, make sure his schedule is adjusted, and plan for daily calls with someone from the family. There are six strong, manly men who can probably handle most of the work, but I’d like to recruit Deidre and my most beautiful wife to help us. While we are six strong, manly men, this task may be beyond us.”

As hoped for, Jessica giggled. “You’re in a good mood. What has you so perky?”

“I have a sleeping child, one who doesn’t have a tendency to scream if he decides the wrong parent picked him up. I’m no longer carrying him, but I have backseat duties, where I get to serve as a pillow. I find this to my liking.”

Her giggles matured to full laughter. “And here I thought you were excited to be free from children after they wore you out making a cushion fort. I had the agents dismantle it so I can have a turn being exhausted from making a cushion fort. Everyone I’ve spoken to has indicated the cushion fort did wonders for you between sessions of handling work while I was gone. I became curious. I am testing to see if cushion forts should be part of our regime.”

If my wife wanted to make cushion forts with the kids, I’d stay out of the way and let her have a turn at being a child again—or for the first time. While I couldn’t give her a childhood of her own back, I could work to make certain the rest of her years were filled with joy.

In so many ways, we lived through our children.

“I think it should be part of our regime. I had a most excellent nap inside the fort. It was either nap or have to deal with more politicians.”

“Heaven forbid.”

“I feel I was not sufficiently warned about the politicians.”

“Do you need me to kiss it better when you come home?”

I loved everything about my wife, but she was out of her mind if she thought I’d refuse that offer. “Absolutely.”

“I’m sure I can think of something. But Eddie will be all right?”

“He’ll be fine. I talked with the school nurse about adjusting his schedule to minimize how much we’ll have to deal with that headmaster.”

“Isn’t he technically a dean?”

“He’s never not responded to me when I’ve addressed him as a headmaster, so as far as I’m concerned, he’s a headmaster.”

“Well, you are the king. You also happen to be a king with a reputation of ignoring formalities whenever you can get away with it, and the smart people just go with your flow. You don’t have temper tantrums like Adam, but you’re far more creative when it comes to making sure someone pays for ruining your delusions.”

I resisted the urge to shrug as I didn’t want to disturb Eddie. “I’ve found there are a surprising number of benefits to being the king, and having the best wife in all of Texas happens to be one of those benefits. But I do wish people would stop ruining my delusions. Am I the only one who remembers I started as a boot scraping?”

Randy and Geoff snorted their laughter, and I grinned that the agents had decided they were no longer technically working. I knew better than to try to break them of all their work habits, especially as they were being paid to make sure I remained in the land of the living and dodge any future kidnapping attempts.

One successful kidnapping was more than enough.

Thus far, there’d been one half-hearted attempt, which I had declined through use of my knee, their gut, and one of Baby’s bridles, which I’d been hauling to the palace for a repair.

The bridle had needed to be replaced.

I’d enjoyed receiving praise from my agents for handling the situation without loss of life. I’d also enjoyed ribbing Randy over it while I’d sat on the fellow’s back. Once the circumstances had come out about the why of it, I’d issued my first and only Royal pardon and gone to help him with the problem.

A horse empath bonded to a heavily pregnant mare about to deliver twins with no money was a good reason to fall prey to desperation. Like my Morning Glory, with a little help from a royal vet, the mare and both foals had come into the world alive.

The man hadn’t had money, but he’d been more than helpful in assisting the RPS in where to find those who’d made the bounty offer for my living head when I’d been kidnapped. As a result, he had walked and the masterminds enjoyed their stay in prison, where they’d remain for life. As the cherry on top, I had one extra horse guzzling grain in my barn.

My wife still had no idea where the filly had come from, but her owner had wanted me to have her as thanks for saving his beloved mare and the other foal.

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