Page 74 of The Wrong Duke

Oh yes, today was Amelia’s wedding day, and as should have been obvious but never hurts to overstate, she was thrilled for it.

The last three months, in fact, it was impossible to determine in which moment she had been at her happiest. Was it the day that Evan rescued her, and they confessed their love for one another? Was it the next week, when her father finished sending the last of her things to her new home, signaling the ending of her old life? Was it the weeks that followed, every day a dream spent with the man whom she adored beyond reason? Or was it each night when she curled up in Evan’s arms, drifting off to sleep, realizing that when she woke, the next day would be as blissful as the one she was leaving?

Really, it didn’t matter. There were no bad days, so why try and compare them? The simple fact was that she had never been happier, and if her life continued to trend in this direction, the rest of it would be just as wonderful.

Today, she supposed, was technically the happiest yet. Putting aside the stress that a wedding brings, everything else was going perfectly. The ceremony was being held at Evan’s church; she was there now, sequestered in an antechamber as she readied to walk down the aisle. Her and Evan’s friends had turned up in droves, there to bear witness to the majesty that would be them committing the rest of their lives together. And her dress, as well as her hair and make-up, had her looking like a princess from a fairytale.

Waiting for her mother to arrive, feeling her nerves spike just a tad, Amelia went back to looking at her reflection. The dress she wore was similar in color and design to the one that Evan had secretly ordered for her all those months ago — a slightly lighter yellow but with the same red hems and lighter yellow floral patterns weaved throughout. Her hair was done up, held back by a crown beset with rubies, and her make-up was simple, designed to make her white skin contrast to the dress so that she seemed to glow.

She looked beautiful. And what was more, she knew Evan would agree. He told her every day how stunning she was, meaning it even when she was at her worst, and she could not wait to see his eyes light up as she appeared at the end of the aisle.

“Amelia...” her mother’s soft voice cut through her imaginings, bringing her back into the room.

Amelia stiffened and slowly turned, forcing a smile when she spotted her mother lurking by the door. She was looking frailer than Amelia remembered, wispy, as if a stiff breeze might pick her up and carry her off. Strange that when Amelia had allowed herself to remember her, she’d seemed much bigger, sharper, crueler was how she remembered her. Not at all the woman who stood gaping.

“You look... beautiful,” she said, voice cracking, smile showing the truth in her words.

“Thank you, Mother.”

The two women stood staring at one another, the silence that grew between them heavy and awkward.

“Ah... we’ll just... yes.” Martha hurried across the room and took Bridget by the hand, leading her from it and closing the door behind them.

“I was surprised when I was sent an invitation,” her mother began. “Really... I didn’t know if I would be...”

“Of course, you would be,” Amelia sighed. “You’re my mother.”

“Am I?” Her mother’s shoulder slumped, and she looked away. “I haven’t much felt like one. Not for years. A mother is supposed to protect her daughters, and in that, I failed the two of you.”

“You did,” Amelia agreed. “Father... you were going to let him sell us.”

“I didn’t want it.”

“But you didn’t try and stop him,” Amelia pointed out. She wasn’t angry, which surprised her. Rather, the words spoken felt like a form of catharsis, needed to be said as a means of getting them off her chest finally. “Not once did you —”

“But I did.” She looked pleadingly at Amelia. “You have no idea how much. Those days he had you locked in your room, you have no idea how much we fought.”

“Not hard enough.”

“I didn’t believe he would truly go through with it,” she pleaded. “When he told me what he planned... I thought he was speaking wildly. How could I not? To think that even he was capable of such horror? Our debts were bad, but I couldn’t have imagined...” she trailed off, unable to say it.

“But he did do it,” Amelia responded coolly. “You were there. You saw it.”

“I wanted to stop him. You have to believe that I begged him!”

“Not hard enough.”

“I... I did my best, Amelia.” She looked away as if from shame. “I only wish I could have done more.”

“As do I.”

Her mother flinched as if stung. Then she shrank back, growing smaller somehow. “I understand if you want to hate me. And I know I have no right to ask for your forgiveness. I just...” She forced a smile and then forced herself to meet Amelia’s eyes. “I just wanted to see you today, is all. To see you this happy. To know you’re with a man who loves you the way the Duke does.” She sniffed and wiped her nose. “I’ve never been more proud.”

It would have been so easy to dismiss her mother there and then. She had seen her. She had heard what she had to say. And with that done, Amelia could put it out of her mind and move on to the rest of her life. Only... in that moment, Amelia realized it wouldn’t be so easy. Not nearly as much as she had thought.

She was wrong. It really was that simple. It was an easy thing to blame her mother for what her father had done, for never standing up to him and going along with his schemes. But it would be wrong to do, and a misremembering of the truth — giving her father an out, was how it felt. When she had been living under her father’s roof, Amelia had felt like a prisoner, and now that she was free, she realized that she wasn’t the only one.

Her mother had been trapped in a loveless marriage, a prisoner like she had been, unable to do or say anything for fear of the retribution it might bring. No, she didn’t stop him. And no, she didn’t stand up to him as Amelia might have liked her to. But she also didn’t have a choice. And seeing how truly happy she was for her now... well, Amelia had to hold back tears because she didn’t want her make-up getting ruined.