Page 33 of Unconditional

When she laid her phone down, staring up at the LED lights that lit the ceiling above her, I knew something was wrong.Maybe it was the way her expression looked just as lost as it had when I caught her in the woods the other day, but I hated it.Setting down my book, I nudged her with my calf.

“What’s wrong, Blondie?”

She shook her head but didn’t say anything, didn’t move to look at me.

I nudged her again.“It’s all over your face so you might as well spit it out.”

In the week that I had shared her company, I had become very familiar with Misely’s emotions.She never hid what she was feeling and it had made me wonder if she even knew how.Whether she was furiously pissed off at me or blissfully happy or nostalgic like she had been earlier when talking about her best friend, it was all right there on her sleeve.But whateverthiswas, I couldn’t get a read on it.

“Misely?”I asked softly, placing my hand on her ankle.

She blinked, finally looking at me.

“Is there something wrong with me?”

The question caught me off guard, momentarily leaving me speechless.For the first time since I’d met her, Misely seemed like she had shrunken in on herself, like she was small.I should’ve responded with something snarky and mean to keep up appearances, but I couldn’t.Not when she looked so hallow.

Before I could answer, she was shaking her head again.“Why am I even asking you?It’s not like you have anything nice to say.”

“Whyareyou?”I asked and when she looked at me again, I cursed myself.There were tears in her eyes and I hadn’t been the one to put them there.Unacceptable.“What’s going on?”

“It’s stupid,” she said, her voice like a whisper.I could hear the way she held back more tears.I hated how it put me on edge, my muscles tightening at the sound.I hated how the idea of anyone making her feel lesser than filled me with a visceral, violent rage.

“Try me.”

Her eyes, the whites turning a pink that made the gray in them turn stark blue, darted to where my hand still lay on her ankle.Where my thumb had begun rubbing circles against her skin without any permission from my brain.

“My ex…” She rolled her eyes when her voice shook, and when she spoke again it was clear.“A little over a year ago we broke up—or, I should say, he broke up with me—because he couldn’t ‘commit’ yet.Couldn’t give me what I wanted.”

“What did you want?”It didn’t matter.This guy was obviously a fucking idiot.

“Everything,” she whispered.“Marriage, a home, kids.The dream.”

She said it like it was a joke, like wanting those things—perfectly normal things—was foolish.The bitter edges in her expression told me that she really believed that it was.

“He didn’t have time to share those things.Between school and work, it ‘wasn’t fair to me.’ But he’s engaged now, so I guess he had the time all along.Just not for me.”

“Misely—”

“And you know what?It’s not just him.Fuck, it’s everyone.Everyone who was ever supposed to care about me.Like it’s too much effort, or maybe I’m just notworththe effort it takes to have a meaningful relationship with.My fucking family.Every friend I’ve had besides Birdie.James.So, it’s gotta be me, right?I'm the problem.”

I wasn’t sure what came over me, but in the span of a moment, I was crossing the short distance, leaning over her, and gripping her face in my hands.

“Misely, shut up and listen to me.”Her eyes widened but she obeyed, her mouth snapping shut audibly.“It’s not you, it’sthem.They are all fucking idiots.If they don’t see what a treasure you are, then that is a shortcoming on their part.Your ex was a total fucking moron for letting you go.”

Her brows dipped.“You’re not supposed to be nice to me.”

I shrugged.“Yeah, well they were.Maybe it’s not about what we’re supposed to do.Maybe it’s about what wewantto do.Do you know what I want to do right now?”My gaze dropped to her lips, so soft, so perfect.

Her head jerked once in a small nod.“I think so.But I need you to tell me.”

This wasn’t the confident woman who’d stripped down and climbed into my shower, demanding I meet her needs.This was not the woman who spit in my face and told me to get fucked.This woman was vulnerable and more than a little bit sad.And for whatever reason, she was looking at me like I could change that.Like I could take that hurt away.Like I could reassure her that she was wanted and worthy.

And damnit, against all better judgment I didn’t want to prove her wrong.

“I want to kiss you.I’ve wanted to kiss you for days but you weren’t talking to me.And now you are talking to me but you’re so sad and I really don’t like that.So right now, I want to fucking kiss you and make you forget all about the stupid fucking idiots who didn’t treat you like you were enough.”

It was too much.I knew it was too much as it was coming out of my mouth, knew it could blow everything, but I couldn’t help myself.My eyes were locked on hers, waiting for her to shove me off, to see right through the bad-boy-bullshit-facade.But she didn’t.Misely’s distraught gray eyes shifted, going from sad and lost, to heated and determined.Her hands fisted in the front of my t-shirt, pulling me in closer.