Page 150 of Tides That Bind

I look up, finding a nurse taking my phone and swiping at the screen.

I don’t correct her that we aren’t family. Because right now, it kind of feels like we are one.

Removing my hand from Harper’s head, I gently rub the peak of the baby’s cheek with my knuckle, in wonder of the softness. “Happy birthday, little guy.”

My phone buzzesin my pocket, and I pull it out, pressing play.

It’s a great day to catch a wave.I’m ready when you are.

“Do we have to go?”

Looking up, I find Lucas staring at me as I pocket my phone and reach for the large tote bag to toss into my trunk. “Why not? It’s a gorgeous day.”

Lucas tugs at the bottom of his yellow rash guard. “It’s not summer yet.”

“Lucas.” I put my hands on my hips. “We live in Southern California. It’s summer most of the year.”

Lucas huffs. “Fine. But can we bring the kite?”

I gnaw on my lip. “Isn’t it broken?”

“Do you think Riley can fix it at work?”

Before I can answer, Lucas sprints to the garage, pulling open the door and returns with his kite in toe, damaged tail and all.

“We could get a new one,” I tell him as he gently places the broken kite on top of my tote bag in the trunk.

Lucas shakes hishead. “Dad made this.”

I press my lips together. “Well, let’s see. Maybe Riley can tape it.”

I’m a ball of nerves before I even pull out of the driveway and head towards the beach.This is stupid,I think to myself. I blame Margot, the school counselor. She’s the one who put this into my head in the first place.

When I turn onto the Boulevard, I change my tuneslightly. I still hate Margot, even though she means well. But I can, at least, do the thing I’m encouraging Lucas to do—just try. That’s all anyone ever can do. That’s what Riley and I will do today—try our best to tandem surf.

And tomorrow, we’ll try to fight the town and police department.

Both seem near impossible.

The only comfort I have is knowing that no matter what happens today, whether we inspire Lucas to gently face his fear and get into the water, or whether we take Tides home, I’ll know Riley and I gave it our all. Together.

When we get to the beach, Lucas hops out of the car as I open the trunk and runs in the direction of his name being called.

I follow his path, shielding my eyes from the sun with my hand and finding Lucas standing with Riley as they gaze at the surf. Lucas leans ever so slightly into Riley, like he knows he’s safe beside him even when in front of him, things are scary.

But I don’t want this kind of fear to be paralyzing for Lucas. Because one day, and I hope more than anything its decades away, Lucas will have to stand on his own.

I hurry into the side door of the shack.

“Early bird today,” Finn greets me with a smile before his eyes dart into the corner where the tandem board rests. “Ah. Today’stheday, huh? You picked a good one. And Caroline is on her way.”

I don’t need an audience beyond my particular crowd of one, but the idea that I do have people in my corner, I do havefamilyon shoredoesn’t make me nervous. It puts me at ease. Because, like grief, when you’re surfing, you’re on your own. But it doesn’t hurt to know that outside of the thick of it your people are cheering you on.

I look at the tandem board. Today I have Riley behind me.

Tossing my keys at Finn, I grab my wet suit hanging on the door of Riley’s office. “He brought his kite. Think you can fix the tail while we warm up?”

Finn nods. “I’ll keep him busy for a bit.”

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