Page 115 of Tides That Bind

I whip around.

There’s been nothingbarelyabout the time following Nate’s death. And that won’t change in another month, or another year. The loss will be there, large and overwhelming some days, but other days, I’ll feel fortunate I had something to miss at all.

I think.

“You are out of line,” I seethe, but the truth is, I’ve swallowed the seeds of doubt because at the same time I tell him that I also ask myself,is he really?

“What’s out of line…” Silas towers over me. “Is fucking Nate’s best friend before he’s cold in the ground. Or maybe it’sinline. Maybe this has been going on between you two this whole time. Maybe you were fucking when Nate was—“

As quickly as I raise my hand to slap him, Silas grabs my wrist.

But just as quickly, I’m shoved to the side, and Silas into the car—by Riley.

“You put your hands on her again and you’ll be on medical leave after I break them, do you understand me?”

Riley presses his forearm harder into Silas’s chest, pulling a grunt from him.

Silas’s face twists as he huffs out a breath. “It’s a felony to assault a police officer.”

“Oh. I’m aware.” Riley smirks. “That’s why I stepped in to prevent my client from doing something stupid with the hand you didn’t grab. Like punching you right into the gut. She might be on the petite side, but don’t fool yourself.” His voice lowers. “My girl grew up around lions. Don’t think she’s scared of you.”

My girl.

I keep hearing the words Riley said so easily.

Silas takes a deep breath and smooths out the wrinkles in his shirt when Riley lets go and moves to my side.

“Better get going, Silas. Or I’ll call your buddies and report your harassment.”

I watch as Silas cocks his tongue against his cheek and shakes his head. “We’ll be seeing you around sooner or later, Riley.”

“You will. In court,” Riley snaps as Silas walks away. He’s standing partly in front of me, watching Silas walk across the street and back to his car and doesn’t move until he drives off down the Boulevard.

It’s only because I drop my keys that I realize my hands are shaking.

“Hey,” Riley asks. “You okay?”

I nod.

“Whatever he said to you,” Riley begins, bending down to get my keys, “Don’t let it get into your pretty little head.”

I pull my bottom lip between my teeth but release it quickly. “It was about Tides.” These words, they’re a lie. But like I lie about the tooth fairy or Santa to preserve Lucas's innocence because Ilovehim, I lie to Riley because I can’t bear to ladle him with more guilt than he already carries.

“What’s out of line is fucking his best friend before Nate’s even cold in the ground.”

And it’s too late. These words aren’t in my head.

They’re drilling into and permeating their way into my heart.

“Oh, Lucas.” I unzip his duffle bag for the fifth time since I deemed it packed and ready to go. “How many do you need?”

Lucas drops another two action figures into the bag. “They’renot the Avengers without Iron Man.” He rolls his eyes and I have no idea where he picked that up.

We both look up when there’s a knock on Lucas's door and find Riley. “I’ve gotta head to work, man. Give me a hug goodbye.”

Lucas hops off the bed and runs, wrapping his arms around Riley’s waist. “See ya later.”

“Zip that tent up tight.” Riley ruffles Lucas's head. “Keep the bears out.”

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