Page 7 of Midnight Dissonance

“Not to worry. You’ll find the sub meant for you. I’m sure of it. When you feel the Ryan click, it will make all this shite matter little.”

“Aye, later.” Josh left his cousin in his office and headed to his car.

The Ryan click. What rubbish. It was an old family legend that when a Ryan met their intended mate in this life, they felt a click inside them. And once they did, they were done for. No one but the person they experienced the click with would ever do.

He might be Irish to the depths of his soul, but he didn’t believe in the Ryan click or soulmates. Even though the Irish even had a saying for it: Mo Anam Cara. Which roughly translates to My Soul Mate or My Soul Friend. But that’s because ancient Celts believed that when two individuals formed a deep, lasting bond, their souls would mingle. Hence, the soul mate dribble everyone went on about.

In his sleek black Mercedes sedan, he drove the short distance to his penthouse apartment.

He was pissed, but his feelings about tonight were layered. Because there had been a moment with Lexi where she’d looked young and vulnerable. But then she fought back like a frightened kitten, swiping at him.

And against his better judgment, it left him wondering what her life was like. What had happened to make her that disagreeable? The understatement of the century, except it was true.

And she was the first woman to turn him down in years. As angry as he should be, he was concerned. A woman didn’t refuse like that, safeword out that way, unless there was a bigger problem.

And if she was expelled from the club, how would she find a Dom who could help her? And he wondered if there was something he could do for her.

Bloody hell, the lass didn’t want him, and he couldn’t stop thinking about her.

Lexi arrived home feeling dejected. Tonight had not gone the way she had hoped. The last thing she planned on was getting suspended from her favorite place to blow off some steam. And potentially get her ass spanked and fucked.

It was all his fault too—Josh Ryan.

Did he have to be her type? Tall, dark hair, and sexy as fuck with his chiseled jawline and broad shoulders that had stretched the material of his sport coat. But it was his eyes, so dark brown they appeared like black flames. The ones that had called her ten times a fool for refusing him. Perhaps she should have just submitted and scened with him. But the thought of becoming another notch on his bedpost had her seeing red. She didn’t want to be one of many. She wanted a Dom to treat her as if she was special. Not to add another notch, but because he was done adding notches and wanted to be with her, wanted to claim her, and be her biggest supporter when the world became too much and she needed to lean.

But players and narcissists would never see beyond their own needs. And she could never see Josh Ryan giving up his love ’em and leave ’em lifestyle for anyone, let alone her.

Why was she still thinking about him when she should be burning his name in effigy for getting her kicked out of the club?

Gah!

All she wanted was to have one person in her corner. Just one. Why was it so hard for her to find anyone who truly gave a shit?

Her less-than-sparkly attitude tended to cause waves. But she couldn’t make herself fit into what other people found acceptable. She should know. She’d been trying to fit into spaces that didn’t feel right to her all her life.

Her parents were the worst sort of narcissists imaginable. Lexi’s older sister, Lisa, was their golden child. Lisa could do no wrong in their eyes. She could announce that she went on a killing spree and was going to jail, and her parents would move heaven and earth to keep her out of prison. And yet, Lexi could do nothing right. If she did something like that, their response would be along the lines of she did the crime, so now she must do the time. She’d done everything they asked of her, but it never mattered and only made her miserable. Until two years ago, she decided she couldn’t continue down the soulless path they’d set for her life.

It was her life. She was the only one who should determine where it was headed. But here’s the thing—even after being subjected to crappy parents who she didn’t think ever loved her, she still wanted that loving, supportive relationship so much she ached for it.

And her parents, Jill and David Williams, had cut her out of their life and weren’t speaking to her because she wouldn’t bow to their demands.

And it was why she rented a single room from her sister. The house wasn’t bad. It was in a good neighborhood. And she and Lisa got along well enough. Although she seemed to act more and more like their parents every day. It was fine. As soon as she paid off her loan, she was out of here anyway.

Lisa was in the kitchen with a glass of wine and case files on the table. She looked up as she entered the house, given the open floor plan of the home. “You’re home early. I thought you were going to a party.”

“I did. The party was lame, though, and I bailed,” she lied. “I’m taking a bath and going to bed.” Because maybe tomorrow the world would look better. And she wouldn’t be close to tears over losing a place that she thought of as a sanctuary. Where she wasn’t judged for what she wore or what she did.

Josh Ryan had no idea how much he had screwed her. And all because of some misplaced egotistical bullshit.

Her sister arched a brow. “Mom and Dad called.”

Lexi’s soul shriveled. She couldn’t help it. If they called, it was never good. Even when they made offers, it always came laden with fine print. “What did they want?”

“Just checking up on things.”

“You mean they want to see if I’ve fucked up my life more.”

“It’s not like that, Lex—”

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