Page 80 of The Way We Fell

Two pairs of feet thunder above our heads before two curious faces appear between the spindles of the bannister.

“Aunty K? Why you crying? Are you sad?” Maisy’s small voice floats down the stairs and her bright green eyes search my face with concern. Amie scoops her daughter into her arms and jogs down the stairs.

“Go and play, Maisy Mouse. We’ll be in soon, okay?” She ushers Maisy into the living room and me into the kitchen, pulling the door ajar, just enough to keep an eye on her daughter, and enough to give us some privacy from small eyes and ears. Paloma pulls out a dining chair before pushing me into it and bending to wipe the tears from my face. Amie pulls out a bottle of wine and a bottle of tequila, sets them on the table, and then sits across from me, pinning me with her own concerned gaze.

“What’s going on, K?”

“Ruth—” I hiccup. “Ruth hates me.”

Just when I thought I was all cried out, a fresh wave of tears clogs my throat and burns my eyes. I drop my head into my hands and sob as Amie and Paloma rub gentle circles on my back.

“What? Why would she hate you, Katy? Who could ever hate you?” Paloma strokes my hair softly. It feels so nice. Her touch is gentle and tender, at complete odds to the snarl in Ruth’s tone earlier. I shake my head.

“Katy? Katy, talk to us. What’s going on, babe?”

“I’m—” I hiccup again. I rub at my eyes with the back of my hand. Amie stretches in her seat, peering around the half-closed door to check on Maisy, playing with some dinosaur figures, before returning her attention to me. “I’m in love with Jay. And we’ve—we’re together. And she found out.”

“Jay? As in, Ruth’s brother Jay? Sexy army man Jay?”

“Lo.” Amie’s voice is a low warning. And then: “Oh, honey.”

My best friend wraps me in her arms, sliding me across the table towards her. Paloma piles on top of us, her long, willowy limbs surrounding us both.

“How long?”

“Months, I guess. I don’t know. We’ve been together for a few weeks.” I raise my head and sniffle. My nose is stuffy, and my eyes are swollen almost completely closed from crying. There’s a rhythmic pounding in my head, a drumbeat in time with my pulse. I turn to Paloma to explain. Although Amie knows a little of my feelings for Jay, Paloma only knows that we’ve become friends. “After he came out with us for Roo’s birthday, we sort of… became friends, I guess. And then more.”

“Oh, Katy.” Amie runs her hand over my hair as Paloma stands and rummages in a cupboard. “You should’ve said something, babe.”

“I know.” My voice comes out as a whisper. Paloma turns back to me with a cool, damp tea towel in her hands, and uses it to wipe my face gently. My stomach lurches at the tenderness of her touch. I’ve lied to my best friends for months, and they’re still treating me with a kindness I don’t deserve.

“At his birthday?” Paloma asks, and I nod. “Why didn’t you tell us?” She sits back in her seat and clasps my hand in both of her own. I can feel the tears beginning to well behind my eyes again and I shake my head.Deep breaths, Katy.I inhale and hold it for four beats, and then exhale again.

“I knew he was looking at you like he wanted to screw your brains out.” Amie barely looks up from her phone as her thumbs fly across the screen, but she traps her tongue between her teeth in a smirk as she speaks. She flips the phone around to show Paloma what’s on the screen, but I catch sight of Ruth’s kangaroo emoji and a fresh wave of sadness slams into me.

“I didn’t want to hurt Ruth,” I whisper. “I didn’t want her to know. At first, we were just friends, you know? But then… it just happened.”

“Is it serious?” Amie puts her phone face-down on the table and rests her hands over mine and Paloma’s. I nod again, and a small smile tugs at the corners of Amie’s lips. She squeezes her free arm around my shoulders.

“I just—” I sniffle. “I don’t want to hurt her. But I don’t want to lose Jay either. I’ve never felt like this before, Amie.” I lock eyes with her. “I can’t lose him.”

“You won’t lose him, babe,” Paloma promises. She reaches over to hug me again. “Or Roo. Just give her some time.”

Chapter forty-two

Jay

AfterseeingKaty’spanickedtext, I drive immediately to Amie’s house, to find my girlfriend sobbing in the arms of two of her best friends. It takes everything in me to stay calm and tear myself away, but after a long moment of holding her, and having Amie and Paloma promise to take care of her, I head straight to my sister’s flat, where my temper finally gets the better of me.

“What the fuck, Ruth?”

“What the fuck? What the fuck YOU, Jay,” my sister hisses. “You lied to me.”

She spins around angrily and I’m momentarily taken aback by the fury blazing in her eyes. Her jaw is set, brow furrowed in a deep scowl. She stalks towards me, squaring up to me with her chest puffed out and heaving with angry breaths. “How the fuck dare you? Mybest friend, Jay. My best friend.”

“I’m not going to apologise for how I feel. You can be a brat as much as you want, but you’re not going to attack Katy over something you don’t know. She’s your best friend and she deserves better than that. You’re better than that, Ruth.”

“That’s the entire fucking point. You lied to me.Shelied to me.”

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