Page 17 of When Embers Become Ashes

Me: as much as I miss you, I want to finish College first and turn 18, I don’t want to lead SJ to you, I haven’t heard from him for a fair number of years now, and I hope to keep in that way x

Me: don’t tell Ren he won’t understand and will go all Grumpy Alpha on me x

Trick: I hate you’re alone, but I understand; the place we are at is great and if you need help you call me, no matter what time of day, and we will come for you x

Me:I love you

I type out in Japanese, he replies the same way

Trick: Always

Over the next few months, I get into a routine of work and college with daily texts from Trick; he lets slip that he hasn’t told Ren we are in contact at all, unlike Trick, who is trying to bribe and nag me into dropping college and moving there, he thinks Ren would just kidnap me, not giving me a choice.

16 years old

When my 16thbirthday approaches, Trick throws a tantrum because I won’t give him my address so he can send me a present. I told him to refer to the Ren theory, For the same reason, I won’t tell him which college I go to.

Right when I was born, my mate marks appear, I never expected to get any as I’m a broken supe.

Down my spine, starting below my birthmark. It burns like I’m being branded, but I’m used to pain and keep quiet, each time the searing pain starts to lessen another starts, until I have ten marks, it takes over three hours for the pain to stop, I’m panting and have made holes in my sheet from digging my nails in for so long, I have to change my bedding and shower due to the sweat and tears wetting my bed, I give myself the time in the shower to daydream about having ten people out there who love me more than anything, then pack it away somewhere inside it will never see the light of day.

Tricks text asking if I got any is there waiting when I wake up, he also wishes me a happy birthday, and a photo of a cupcake with a smore stuck in the top, and I do my best to avoid the question. It doesn’t happen often, I may be a red head but losing my temper would result in me being punished, so I have a tight grip on that emotion, but I lose my temper with my only friend.

ME: I got, ten marks, but it doesn’t matter. They will all reject the broken supe! Just leave it!

I feel a few tears fall, and brush them away angrily trying to get myself back to normal, as I watch the dots appear and disappear a few times, and then two photos come through.

TRICK: These are mine and Ren’s marks. If you have these, we won’t reject you. You have always been home. Sorry, I upset you. Good night xx

ME: No, I’m sorry, my insecurities hit, and I know how strong you both are. You can do so much better than little broken me. Goodnight,love you always, my homexxx

He doesn’t reply until morning when I get a GIF of Smores, one of his favorite treats.

I manage to get my two-year course done in one year, then spend July – October working my ass off so I can move near Trick.

I pick up my final check and head back to the group home to grab my stuff before I get on the bus. Well, on the first bus of five, I plan to text Trick once I get my ticket.

But when I get to the street where the halfway house is, there is a familiar sickly yellow car sitting there.

I hoped I would never see it again. I hadn’t told them I was leaving, so this wasn’t their stopping me. I quickly text Trick, nipping into the corner shop, that also has a drop for sending parcels, I put my phone, laptop, most of my cash, and cards in a box, and mail them to Trick. I kept enough money, so it’s not obvious I’ve ditched everything. I also have a basic burner phone for emergencies.

ME: Jameson found me. A parcel is coming to you. My phone, laptop, and money are inside. I will get to you as soon as possible. I need to come home.I love you. x

I walk into the halfway house, mumble a hello to whoever is at the desk, and go to my room.

There, Jameson is standing with two wolves.

" Get your stuff, get in the car, or they will do both for you.” He walks past me and downstairs. The 'muscle' stands and looks me up and down. One adjusts his dick, the other licks his lips.

Everything is packed. I shipped some stuff last week because I knew I was leaving. Dan and Elise’s friend Ignatius, their lawyer, will care for their estate until I turn 18. He agreed to set up a storage place for me so I could send my art and personal items for safekeeping.

I can access this storage at any time or arrange for it to be delivered to me, but it means I don’t have items around that could be stolen or damaged.

The agreement I have had with the state since graduating high school states that as long as I can financially support myself and stay in higher education or an apprenticeship, I am nearly free.

I stayed at the halfway house, so I didn’t risk having random social workers checking up on me as the house does all the checks and sends in reports.

I guess that’s backfired now. I grab my duffle and backpack. The messenger bag I take to work has a bit of cash and snacks inside. I walk down and out the door then slide in the back seat, something I’ve done so many times. I escaped once for nearly three years. I will get away again, even if it kills me.

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