Page 31 of Saved By the SEAL

“No way. I can’t admit that she got out of my sight. We’ll have to figure it out later. For now, I want you.”

Urgh, they begin kissing once more. I snatch my eyes away and try to keep the sickness inside. They are so disgusting, I want them gone. I really think they might start having sex in front of me in a moment, and I can’t stand it.

“Come on, big boy.” Thankfully, Katya grabs Alexander’s hand and she pulls him from the room. “I need you right now.”

As they go, my heart leaps up into my throat. I lean forward a little bit to see if there is anyone around, but it really does look like they have gone up the stairs. This is a trick, surely. They’re fucking with me right now. This is some kind of trap to see if I’m going to run away once more. The problem is, I really want to. I really need to get the hell away once more. And this time, I need to go and never come back. I need to get away and not get caught because they’ll kill me a second time.

Mind you, if this is a trap, they will kill me as I try to leave. But if I don’t go, then I’ll regret it forever. I have to give it a try. I rise up to my feet, cringing at every noise I make. I feel sick to my stomach as I start to tiptoe ever so slightly toward the door. This is the most anxious that I’ve ever felt in my whole entire life, but it’s also the most pumped and determined I’ve ever felt in my life. I really need to get the hell away from this place. I have to get out of here before I end up dead.

Fuck, keep on going, I think desperately as I creep toward the door. Don’t stop. Think about Jordan.

Even though I don’t stand a chance of seeing him again—alive, anyway—I keep him at the forefront of my mind while I creep toward the door. Katya and Alexander are now making so much noise that I don’t think they’ll be able to hear me, but I still remain quiet. As I edge toward the door handle with a shaking hand, I feel like this isit, the end of my life. Surely, as soon as I swing this open, a whole bunch of alarms will go off and everything will erupt and explode. But that still doesn’t stop me. I continue to reach forward, and I open it. Much to my surprise, by some strange coincidence, nothing happens. The door opens and no noise erupts. That leaves me nothing to do other than to run. I take off at the speed of light. I move faster than I’ve evergone before, even in this stupid ass outfit with my entire body aching from pain.

As I run, I’m still convinced that someone is going to come after me, that no one is going to let me go, but I keep on moving and no one comes. Maybe I’m dreaming. Perhaps I’m in the middle of some kind of induced nightmare, but I won’t let that stop me. I’ll keep on going until something changes, one way or another.

25

JORDAN

“Ican’t go home yet,” I suddenly declare to Landon, shocking him nearly as much as I do myself. “I need to go back to the apartment first. Michelle’s apartment, because I left some stuff there and it’s really important. I have to go.”

“What?” Landon stares at me in shock. “What are you talking about? We have to go to your house. That’s what Max said.”

“I know, but Ineedto go there. You don’t understand, Landon. We have to go right now. I have stuff I need to get.”

I need Landon on my side, even if he doesn’t know what I’m doing, because the compulsion to get to that apartment is overwhelming. I don’t know what it is, but I have to get there. I don’t think I left anything there. I feel like I took everything away already, but I need to get there, tobethere. There might be a clue as to what happened to Michelle there, and I need answers. Even if she isn’t the person I thought she was, I want to know what happened to her. Ineedto know. I can’t help it.

“But Max said that we weren’t to go there,” Landon informs me. “He said to keep away because you got shot.”

“No one is there now. No one will be there again. They won’t make the same mistake twice. Plus, I’ll have you with me.”

I stare at Landon, keeping my eyes on him even if he’s pointedly looking at the road and refusing to see me at all. He doesn’t want to look at me because he knows that I’ll win. I’ll pull him along to my way of thinking, and he’ll end up taking me. But that’s exactly why I want him to see me because I goddamn well need him to do what I want.

“Landon, I’m going to that apartment at some point whether you come with me or not. I need to get there. I know that Max is worried about me, but I know exactly what I’m doing. I got shot before because I didn’t know that anyone was after me, but now I’ll bemuchmore aware. You used to be a Navy SEAL too, right? So, you know our training. You know that I can do this.”

“I just don’t know what’s the best thing to do,” he admits. “Because I can see that you want this, that youneedit, but Max has given me specific instructions… but then, he also praised your intuition, didn’t he? So maybe we should do this.”

“Please, let’s just do this already,” I beg. “You don’t know how important this is to me. I’m not going to give you any reason to panic. I wouldn’t do anything to put us in unnecessary danger. I’m not about that. I just need to get some stuff, that’s all. Believe me, I don’t want anything to happen with the Russians either. I just want to have all of this over.”

Thank goodness Landon finally gets the hint and asks me for directions to Michelle’s apartment. Relief floods me as we take a new road and head the way that I want us to go. I can lean backand relax once more, knowing that everything will be sorted soon. I can be back at that house and finally see everything that I need to… whatever that might be.

“So, is this it?” Landon asks as we pull up outside the building. “This is the place? Michelle’s apartment?”

“Yep, this is it.” My stomach churns as I see it. I’m immediately put on edge. “I won’t be long. Are you coming with me?”

Landon nods and follows me up the stairs without saying anything. I’m sure he’s pretty put out by this, but he can’t be thinking anything like me. I fear that I might find Michelle inside, with a gun at my head or dead. I don’t want to see any of that, but this is my only chance to get to see what’s inside. I’m going to have to witness whatever it is.

Finally, I’m at the door and I have to use my key to unlock it. I hear Landon behind me cocking his gun, but I don’t turn to see him. I don’t want to face him while we’re taking on potential danger. If he needs to shoot… well, what can I do?

“Michelle?” I make an idiot of myself by calling out her name as soon as we get inside. I shine a spotlight on me so if she, or any other Russians who might be inside this building, want to kill me off, then they can do it now. “It’s me, Jordan.”

Nothing. I fucking get nothing back, but that doesn’t stop me from continuing to walk in. I step carefully as I go room to room, trying not to disturb anything, not that there is much to disturb. It’s been cleaned up since I was shot, by the look of it, and most things were taken out. If I didn’t have the intense memories of me and Michelle in every single inch of this place making the best memories ever, then I would be hard pressed to imagine our ever being here. It’s too weird for words.

“Wait.” Oh, my God, all of a sudden, at a certain spot in the middle of the kitchen, I stop dead as a memory creeps through me. The one that I’ve been desperately trying to get my hands on ever since this first happened. The shooting. “Oh, my God.”

“What? What is it?” Landon demands. “What the fuck is happening, Jordan? Where is all of your shit?”

“It wasn’t Michelle.” I sink to the floor in relief. “Oh, my God, Landon, it wasn’t Michelle who shot me. It was Kate. The woman who pretended to be an American spy. She tricked me and then she shot me. She wanted me dead.”