Page 14 of Guarded By the SEAL

I delicately pull back the cover, doing everything that I can not to disturb him. It’s scary. My heart pounds in my mouth because I know that grabbing his attention right now will be the most awkward thing of all, but somehow, I manage to gain just enough of a gap to get myself out.

Wow. It isn’t until I’m out the bed completely that I allow myself to look at Harry appreciatively. It is hot in this room. I don’t usually wear a lot to bed at all, although I managed to stay dressed last night. But the same can’t be said for him. At some point during the night, Harry must have stripped off to his underwear which means now I can really see him. I can ogle the man without him looking right back at me… and oh, my God. What a man. He’s thick and muscular, sculpted by the freaking gods. Obviously, an ex-Navy SEAL and someone who works in protection is going to look strong, but Harry is hot as well. He looks even better without his clothing on, which creates an unexpected stirring in my panties.

Actually, it’s more than a stirring. It’s an ache, a desperate need, a yearning to wrap myself tightly around him. I want to lick all over his body, to taste him, to feel him inside me. I want to do all the things to him I know I shouldn’t. I mean, I can’t feel an attraction to Harry. He’s my protector, here to save me from my husband. I can’t have lustful feelings when my life is hanging in the balance. At least, I shouldn’t.

But it’s been a long time, that much is for sure. I thought that Jake was just too busy and tired to want me at night, but it seems that he just didn’t want me. He was preparing to sell me.

So, I’ve been unsatisfied by a man for a while now, and I can just tell by looking at him that Harry would know exactly what to do with my body. He would make me feel fucking phenomenal. The temptation to climb back into bed with him, to just feel him some more, is damn near overwhelming…

Stop it.I drag myself away. I head for the bathroom where I will be alone and unable to cause any damage. He is as damaged by love as me. There is no way he will want me.

Everything is just heightened, that’s all. It’s the situation more than anything else. The last thing that I want to do is get all caught up in that feeling and end up doing something stupid. It’s bad enough that I embarrassed myself with my husband. I don’t want to make another mistake like that. I thought that Jake wanted me. I thought that we were in love and married, and my judgement was wrong. Once in a lifetime is more than enough for that, thank you very much. No, never again. I’m better off alone.

The hot jets of shower water don’t make me feel any better. If anything, they ignite the urge to have someone touch me all over. And not just someone, but Harry. Every single time I close my eyes, I can see him naked and it’s seriously intense. The pulsing and throbbing between my thighs nearly draw my eager fingers in. All I want to do is give myself some release, but it’s too dangerous. Once I slide down that slippery slope into touching myself and fantasizing about Harry, it’s only one more step to it becoming real.

My body would like that. It aches for it, actually, but my brain knows better. It’s a bad idea. Real bad.

I can’t tell if Harry is still sleeping when I tiptoe through the bedroom once more. He has his face turned away from me now, but I make my escape anyway. I can’t be too near him. I can’t stir myself up anymore. I need to get my damn head in order. Fresh air will be the best way to make that happen.

I don’t intend to go far from the house. Much as I love exploring the island, after last night, I don’t want to go too far on my own. Especially if Harry really is still sleeping, but a little walk through the garden right outside the house over to the swimming pool should be enough to calm me down.

Right, time to get your thoughts in order, I tell myself crossly. Time to stop thinking about Harry.

I scold my brain, deciding that I’m only feeling anything at all for Harry because it’s inappropriate, because he is the only man here, and because he’s been nice to me. We don’t even get along, really. We certainly don’t have much in common, so I can’t really like him. It’s just a chemical thing. My body’s reacting to everything that’s happened over the last few days. Yes, it might be acting in a strange way, not how I would think, but I suppose there isn’t anything I can do about that. Just ignore it.

What the hell was that? As I stand at the edge of the swimming pool, goosebumps pop up and down my arm. It isn’t cold, so I don’t know exactly where they have come from, but they freak me out. My eyes dart everywhere. I don’t know what I’m looking for, but it’s something. Jake, maybe. I fear that he’s found me and is about to take me down, kill me or sell me while Harry is still upstairs. I won’t be able to defend myself alone. Not against my husband. He’s strong and clearly, very scary too. If he’s here…

A scream rises up within me. I want to let it loose, but it’s stuck. Something is blocking my airways, making it challenging to even breathe, never mind get any sound out. Dizziness flows through me. I don’t know if I can even keep standing up. I might fall into the pool. My fear might be what kills me.

Run. Something snaps inside my brain, thank goodness, and I take off. I race back inside to find Harry standing in the kitchen, smiling and whistling to himself as he cooks a pan of eggs. This is a weird happy sight to see while I’m in the middle of a panic attack which has come from nowhere.

“It… it feels weird,” I gasp out, hoping that Harry can understand me. “By the pool. I felt it.”

“You did?” Harry immediately takes me seriously, thank goodness. He peers out by the door and even takes a little walk around. While he looks, my pulse rate calms down. Everything shifts and begins to return to normal. As it does, I realize that I might have just overreacted a little bit. I didn’t actually see anything or even hear anything. I don’t know where that feeling came from. It might have just been the aftereffects of last night. I kinda know that Harry isn’t going to find anything. “There is no one out there.”

“Yeah, sorry.” I slump into one of the chairs. “I freaked myself out and I don’t know why. But I shouldn’t have brought you into it as well. I will be more careful in the future.”

“Hey, even if you do just have a bad feeling, I want you to tell me,” he reassures me. “I want to know. But I don’t have it today. I think everything is alright. There isn’t any reason to panic.”

I nod, immediately accepting his words. Harry is more of an expert in this than me. “Thank you.”

As he smiles at me, I make a pledge to myself that I will simply stay near him from here on out. I can ignore any urges that I might have for him if it keeps me alive. I’m not going to worry about things being strained or weird between us when I need to be worried about Jake and his plans. I have a lot more to be focused on. I shouldn’t even be thinking like I was this morning. It’s time to be sensible.

I can’t keep seeing this as an escape from real life where anything can happen, where I can lose myself in the moment andit won’t matter because the consequences don’t exist. I’m here for a reason.

“I might go swimming after breakfast,” I suddenly blurt out, needing to say something before I get myself all chewed up again. “If you don’t mind staying with me. I don’t have my swimwear with me. That wasn’t exactly top priority when I left in a panic, but I might as well use it while we’re here.”

Harry nods, just as I knew he would. He’s probably just glad that I’m not fighting his need to look after me anymore. I’m hoping some exercise will help me put things in perspective. Jogging always helped me back at home, but I think swimming might be my best option here.

12

HARRY

She is too hot for words. Fucking hell, I can hardly stand this. When Petra asked me to stay with her while she swam, I thought it would be a simple job. I was in for an easy afternoon sitting out in the sun. But no, I’m tortured, honestly in pain. I don’t know if she has done this purely to drive me wild.

Those lace panties… they might as well be see-through. She must know that. I swear she wants me to see her tight little ass through them. She wants me to be on fire for her. And that bra… well, she’s spilling out the top of it. Her beaded nipples shine through, demanding my focus and attention. I want to be a gentleman, but this is the most of Petra that I have seen, and my God, I can hardly control myself.

It no longer matters that she’s been spoiled and bratty, that I don’t know how much I even like her as a person. I want to pin her against the wall and fuck her. Hard. I want to make her scream.

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