Page 15 of Got to be You

Every single time I plan to blow Jax away, he does it to me first. He absolutely knocks my socks off. Tonight, he looks so stunning, it’s hard to even look at him. I mean, I love the joy on his face, but knowing that I’m not going to be able to be a part of what makes him happy is killer.

“This is such a nice place,” I say with a smile to break the tension that I just know I’m creating. “Thank you so much for bringing me here. It’s a little posh for college students, though, isn’t it?”

“Not too posh for a guy who is about to become a rock star, though,” he jokes back. “Soon, I’ll be able to take you to places like this all the time. You know, if this all works out like I know it’s going to.”

“Oh, it will.” I take his hand in mine across the table and stroke it gently. “I just know it. I only needed to see that video to know you guys are going to take the world by storm. You’re brilliant.”

And then a piece of him will belong to everyone, none of him to me. But I’ll always have the amazing memories, and that’s what I need to remember. I grab him and pull him around to me to ensure that we get as many photos together of this night as we can, just in case. I need as much of him as I can keep.

“Hey, you know, there is something that I’ve been meaning to tell you,” he declares as he pulls away after kissing me on thecheek. “I’ve wanted to say it for a while now, but the time hasn’t been right. Now it is, though.” My pulse races faster. What the hell is going on now? I don’t know if I have the stomach for more news today. I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it. “I’ve fallen for you, Lilly. I’m in love.”

Oh, wow. In that moment, the whole world stops spinning around me. Everything shifts and changes. I’ve known I love him for a while now, but I had no idea that he felt the same way.

“I… I…” I want to tell him, but I’m scared of slipping deeper. “I…”

“I got this for you today.” All of a sudden, he’s hooking a heart-shaped pendant around my neck, really making this like a date from a dream. “Just to remind you that no matter what, I love you.”

Tears roll hard and fast down my cheeks. I don’t know if they’re happy ones because this could be the start of something special, something incredible, or sad because this is the bitter sweet, perfect way to say goodbye. It really could be either. I have no idea, and it’s crushing me.

“I love you too,” I finally reply, glad to get the feelings out there at last. “I love you so much.”

11

JAX

“This is all happening so fast,” Spike declares as he bounces in the seat next to me. The flight to LA isn’t going to be a long one, but I don’t think he can handle however long it takes. “I can’t wait to get there and show these Hollywood moguls who kicks ass. they’re going to sign us for sure. I can feel it.”

I wish I could share his confidence. I hook my fingers around the armrests to try and keep the nerves inside, but my knuckles give me away with the shade of white that they have become.

“You think so?” Harry leans across me, showing anxiety on his face as well. “I can’t help thinking that everything that we’ve done so far has worked out so well, something has to go wrong. What if it does?”

“No, nothing will go wrong here.” Spike is sticking to his guns, utterly determined. “I promise you, this is going to be the start of the rest of our lives. we’re going to make some real progress here.”

They argue it out, observing everything that could, but definitely won’t, go wrong, leaving me stewing in my own emotions about the whole thing. Not that I know how I feel, really. I’ve been floating higher than air but not quite touching the ground for ages, which means I’m everywhere, really. Just a little lost. In a good way, of course, but in a very terrified way as well. Like it could all vanish in a heartbeat.

Instead, because I can’t take the bickering any longer, I slide my eyes closed and try to tune them out, acting like I’m sleeping so they don’t drag me into it. But like every single time I close my eyes, the first person I immediately think of is Lilly. Her face floods my mind and brings a little smile to my lips…

Only this time, I don’t know if I’m smiling, really, because she hasn’t seemed like herself recently. She’s been much quieter, much more serious and somber, ever since we told one another that we’re in love. I don’t think it’s because of the love declaration, though. I think it’s because she’s worried about our future and whether we can go anywhere. If only she could see it like me and just know we’ll find a way to make it work. I don’t know how we can do it. I don’t need to know the details. I just know we have enough love between us to make anything last. We can span the distance.

I suppose the only thing that can show Lilly this is time. Time and effort from the both of us. Once we have shown one another that I can be signed to a record label, be in a famous rock band in LA, and still be together with her. If we love one another enough, then nothing can get in our way…

By the time we land, I must have actually drifted off for a few moments and floated into a dream about Lilly and me. She’s all of me, even as we land. I feel like I’m doing absolutely everything for her. I want Lilly to see that I’m worthwhile, that I can do anything, that nothing will get in my way.

It’s an attitude that I take with me as I head into the studio of the recording label, and it’s probably why the performance that I end up giving is the best I’ve ever done. The other guys follow my lead, and by the time we finish, I can see that we have impressed everyone in the room. I’m starting to feel a bit like Spike in the confidence department, and it feels good. Especially when I see that Will is grinning wildly.

“This is good,” Harry whispers as he pats me on the arm. “We did good, don’t you think?”

I nod encouragingly. “Yep, I think we’re going to sign a contract today.”

I’m flooded with joy, imagining what this is going to mean to me, to us. What our future is going to look like. Everything that we have worked toward is happening, and it’s so good. Soon, we will have a single, an album, we will be featured on the pages of magazines, we will be on television, we will be making money and doing what we love. There is no dream better than this one. This is everything to me.

Eventually, we’re called into a meeting room and given a contract to sign, just as I predicted. Now, I might not know a lot about musical contracts, which I’m only just realizing now issomething that I should have prepared beforehand, but it really does seem like a good one. We all put our names on it anyway, under the guidance of Will, and we secure our future. Our future in Hollywood, living the dream…

“Well, you did it,” Will tells us happily as soon as we’re outside the record label’s building. “You guys have signed a kick-ass contract. If you’re going to celebrate this news, then do it now. Do it tonight. You guys have a hotel suite for the night, so you can enjoy yourselves. Then it’ll be back home, but not for long because we’re going to have to get you a place here. The record label wants you to start recording soon, so you need a place in LA. Tie up all the loose ends you have at home and everything.”

Wow, it really is happening fast. Scarily quick, actually. I’m going to have to make a lot of changes, tell a lot of people, and even disappoint a few, but this is what I want. I’ve signed the contract now, so I’m in no matter what. And that makes me happy, really happy. Finally, I’m doing what’s right for me.

“Wearegoing out tonight, aren’t we, boys?” Spike asks as he pats us both on the shoulders. “We have to make the most of our time in LA. I know we will be back soon, but we’ll be working our asses off then. There is no guarantee that we will be getting to go to lots of Hollywood parties then, so we need to take advantage of the moment while it’s here.” He’s convincing the pair of us, I can see it in Harry’s eyes as well as mine. Not that we need much convincing. “We need to hit the town and see what our new home has to offer.”Our new home.I like the sound of that. “So, let’s get our best outfits on for this.”

---