Page 11 of Got to be You

“I hope I’ll make you proud. In fact, I’m determined to make you proud.”

Will walks me to the door and says goodbye to me as I leave. I already feel like I’m special, like I’m floating on cloud nine, like this is the start of something new. I can’t believe the way todayhas gone. It was just a normal moment that was shattered with a phone call which has turned everything on its head. But in a good way. In the best way, really, because now, the world is my oyster… probably…

There is only one person I want to call with this news as soon as I exit the building, and that’s Lilly. The last few weeks, we’ve been seeing one another a lot. She might not be in love with me like I want her to be, but we’re having a lot of fun together. We don’t see one another every single moment of every single day because we’re both so busy, but each moment that we’re together is perfect.

I might be falling for her, and the more she tells me not to fall for her because she won’t be around for long, the deeper I find myself sinking under the waters of feelings.

“Hey, Jax,” she answers with that delightful warmth in her voice that I love so much. “How are you?”

“Hey, Lilly, I… I have something to tell you.” I stammer because the excitement is too much to handle. “I’ve had the craziest day today. You willnotbelieve it. I can hardly believe it myself.”

“What’s going on?” she asks with a laugh. “You sound all out of breath.”

“I got a call this morning from a music agent who wanted me to come in for a meeting. I went in for the meeting, and basically, the guy wants me to sing with a band that he’s trying to put together.”

“What?” she shrieks. “Are you serious? That’s amazing. You’re such a lucky bastard. We need to celebrate this news. We need tohave a night out here tonight. Everyone will want to be there for you.”

“Well, it isn’tmassivenews,” I remind her. “I haven’t signed anything yet.”

“It doesn’t matter. This is still huge news.” Lilly isn’t being put off. “No one I know has had anything so exciting happen to them in college. Even if it doesn’t turn into anything, you should be proud of yourself. I’m organizing a night out to celebrate you, whether you want me to or not. Because you deserve it.”

I find myself smiling happily. I don’t know if it’s a bit quick, but tonight, I feel like I’m soaring higher than air and I might tell her that I’m falling for her. I want her to know she’s so important to me.

“Thank you, Lilly, that’s really kind of you,” I reply. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“And I’m looking forward to seeing you too, rock star,” she shoots back, making me feel warm inside all over again. “I amsoproud of you, Jax. Honestly, you’re so talented and you deserve all of this. Let’s hope that it’s just the beginning of a long and exciting career.”

Ooh, what if it is? I’mreallytrying not to get carried away with all of this, but it could be, couldn’t it? It could be the start of the rest of my life.

8

LILLY

This is exactly what I wanted,I think to myself as I watch the party explode in the student bar. Everything is in full swing, and Jax is right in the middle of it, being celebrated by everyone. I love it. This is exactly what I had planned for him, and it’s all worked out perfectly. So, why do I feel so weird?

I stand back and lean against the bar while I watch everyone celebrating him like crazy. Jax has the biggest smile on his face as people all around him clap him on the back and tell him that they knew he could do it. He’s in the limelight, which is exactly where he wants to be. God, this is where he’s going to spend the rest of his life, isn’t it? With everyone around him, wanting a piece of him. And me… over in the background.

“Will you stop it?” I hiss to myself as burning hot tears fill my eyes. Ireallyneed another drink. I don’t know why the hell I’m getting emotional right now. This is agoodnight, not one where I should be all choked up. “Don’t get like this. You’ve only been seeing one another for a few weeks.”

It isn’t even a relationship, not really. We’re just casually seeing one another, which is the way I want it to be, so why do I feel like I’m his girlfriend and he’s slipping through my fingers? Why do I feel like I’m about to give up the love of my life for him to have his career? That’s just silly.

“Jax is having the night of his life.” Anna grabs my arm and grins at me. “You did a good job getting everyone here. I bet he’s super grateful to you right now for giving him the night of his life.”

“Er, yeah, I think so,” I admit awkwardly. “I haven’t really seen much of him. That’s all.”

“Oh, right, of course.” Anna nods understandingly. “Because he’s been the center of attention.”

“Mmmhmm.” I cock my head to one side thoughtfully. I don’t want to be in the middle with him. I don’t want all eyes upon me. I even found organizing all of this super embarrassing because I had too much focus on me. That’s why I want to work backstage as a sound engineer. Because I don’t like being looked at.

But maybe that means we can’t make this work. Iknowwe can’t make it work. That’s what I’ve been telling myself this whole time, but I guess I’ve been lost in the fantasy more than I’ve wanted to admit, even to myself. Seeing him living his dream and knowing that it can’t involve me kills me.

“It’s just been a fling,” I hiss angrily as I wipe a stray tear away. I don’t want any more to fall down my face. “Just a sexual thing. A bit of fun. Nothing more. Don’t be this way.”

But I can’t seem to stop myself from getting all messed up. The more that I try to stop the tears from falling, the worse they become. It’s starting to get a little embarrassing. Someone will notice in a moment.

“Oh, my God, Adam is coming over.” Anna bounces excitedly. “What do I do? I don’t know what to do.”

I shrug my shoulders helplessly. There’s no point in giving her an answer because she’ll do whatever the hell she wants to do. Especially when it comes to Adam. Those two can be a nightmare. One minute, they seem to be addicted to one another, and the next, they aren’t talking. I can’t do anything.

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