Page 37 of Dangerous Refuge

“Mom?” Rico’s voice from the doorway stops us both in our tracks. We’ve been shouting at each other and he looks afraid. “Are you okay? Why are you angry?” His bottom lip trembles and Allie rushes over to him, hugging his head to her stomach.

“Oh, baby, I’m not angry. Okay?” Her hands frame his face and she makes him look up at her. “We’re going to stay at Sarah’s place for a few days, okay? Go put your things in a bag.”

“What? No. I like it here,” he protests, backing up. “Sven, make her stop.”

My heart clenches. I remember what it’s like to feel that feeling, sadness and love. I was a boy with a heart full of emotion and compassion once. Now I’m a killing machine. It’s all I know. I know orders and respect, retribution and victory. I can’t respond to him. All I can do is stare at a mother hugging her son whose heart is hurting.

“Go on, pack now.” She nudges him out the door and he pleads with me.

“Sven, please. I don’t want to leave. I like it here.” Rico cries, giant crocodile tears streaming down his cheeks.

“Go on, respect your mother.” I sigh, still believing I can stop this all from happening. If nothing else, I am going to murder that bastard Hensley and convince Allie she needs me still. I don’t know how, but I will. “Take anything you want from the game room.”

Allie glances at me, relief in her eyes. “Yeah, anything you want. Now go pack up.” She nudges him again and he stomps out, sobbing. I am completely enraged that she would make her son feel like this when he clearly wants to be here. That rage bubbles over into my body and I clench my hands into fists. But the moment she shuts the door and turns to me with compassion in her eyes, I soften too.

“Thank you. I know this is hard on him. I appreciate your kindness.”

“Kindness? That wasn’t kindness. That was respect. I offer it to you because that’s how I live my life.”

She stands by the door, her hand still resting on the knob. “Men like you don’t understand women like me. Sven, I can’t raise my son around the violence.”

“Twenty-two counts of sexual battery.”

Her eyebrows furrow at my words. “What?”

“Three charges for attempted murder. Seven different IDs in seven different states.”

“What are you talking about, Sven? Is this your record? Are you confessing to me now who you really are so that I’ll stay? You think telling me your secrets now is going to change anything?” Allie shakes her head and walks toward the suitcase, folds the lid shut and starts to zip it. My next words freeze her in place.

“Paul Marcus Davenport, a.k.a. Paul Hensley. He’s a killer, a rapist, and a con artist, Allie. He’s dangerous. I talked to the cop downtown who is set to serve an arrest warrant. I had Tucker give the sergeant a lock of Rico’s hair from his hairbrush. Paul’s DNA is linked to horrible crimes.”

She turns to face me, her face drained of color. “I can’t raise my son with you, Sven.”

“Then at least stay until they catch him.” My lip wants to tremble, but I can’t understand why. All I want is her safe.

“I can’t. I need to go to Sarah’s.” Allie’s eyes fill with tears. She takes a deep breath and breathes it out slowly. “I care about you, Sven. You got into my head so much that I fucking love you now. And being with you one more night when I know who you are, when I know I can’t stay with you, well that’s going to fuck my heart up more than Paul’s fists ever fucked up my face.” She blinks and tears stream down her cheeks.

“Stay…” I ask her again, but she resolutely shakes her head.

I cup her cheek and pull her closer. “I can’t,” she whispers.

“I need you here.” Something comes over me. Something I haven’t felt in years, decades maybe. “I want you here.”

“You can’t have me, Sven. My son comes first. I need him safe now.”

She doesn’t resist when I lean down and kiss her, our lips brushing lightly over each other. “I can keep you safe.”

“Can you keep us safe from your family? From random men who come into your home bleeding? From people like the ones who murdered your cousin? From—”

I kiss her again, holding her head firmly. My life is a fucking warzone. I walk across situations just waiting for landmines to explode and claim my life every day. I’m a killer and a heathen and she is everything pure and right about this world. She’s right. Being around me isn’t safe. But I’m not safe without her. I’m not ever going to be safe without her. I kiss her again, as if it is the last time I will ever see her. Knowing her ex, it may damn well be.

“Sven,” she whimpers, crying into my mouth. Her words protest my advances, but her hands grip my biceps.

“Allie, please don’t leave.” As our lips meet, I feel a fire ignite inside of me. A fire that I can’t quench. Allie may not be safe with me, but I know one thing for sure—I can’t let her go. Not now, not ever. This is temporary; just until Paul comes out of hiding.

I grab her by the backs of the thighs and lift her, spreading her legs. She wraps them around my waist as she clings to my shoulders. The scent of her arousal wafts up between us, and I know she wants me. She’s light as a feather in my arms.

I carry her to the bed and lay her down, gazing at her with a fierce intensity. My heart pounds with a raw, desperate need for her. She looks up at me, her eyes wide and vulnerable, and I know I can't hold back anymore. I open the fly of my pants, pulling out my shaft, and climb onto the bed, hovering over her. I trail kisses down her neck, reveling in the softness of her skin. Allie moans, arching her back as I reach for her breasts, cupping them in my hands through the fabric of her shirt. Her nipples harden under my touch, and I push the neckline of her top and bra down and take a nipple into my mouth, sucking and biting gently.

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