Page 74 of The Catalyst

I’ve been attached far longer than I would be willing to admit to anyone. Before I fucked her against the kitchen wall. Before I defaced her mother’s car. Maybe it even extends to before I fucked her over the hood of my Mustang.

And, it’s fucked.

Like she said, Nigel won’t ever let her go. He sees her as his property. He’s fine with me playing with his toys, but crossing the line would be claiming his toy as my own.

I warned him that I would if he ever made her cry again, but as far as I know, he hasn’t. He was on good behavior before he left Grove Hill.

But, also, Nigel is one of the few on my short list of people I give a shit about. What I’ve been doing with Beth is a betrayal to that bond. Until recently, Nigel and my mother were the only people I gave a flying fuck about. Then, Bethany fucking Mercer walked into my life and wrecked it, destroyed the very fabric that held my psyche together.

She extended the fucking list.

The walls I keep erected around myself are still at half mast, but they are slowly coming down around her. It wasn’t something I did consciously either. I didn’t want to let her in and she didn’t force her way through. It justhappened.

However, my feelings for her aren’t what I’m having to sit here and mull over. No, no, no. It’s what we're going to have to do now. I know Nigel doesn’t care if I fuck Beth, but I have no clue what Charlie will say to him if he says anything at all.

Hell, even though Gunderson walked in on us, she doesn’t even really know what’s going on. She just knows that we fuck. Plain and simple.

I go over a game plan in my head of the worst case scenario, of Nigel coming back pissed and ready to hurt my princess. I want to make sure we’re ready for it if that happens. I will grab her, put her in my car, and drive her the fuck out of here. It’s the only fucking option I have.

I can’t let him hurt her again.

I don’t deal with guilt. It’s something I’ve very rarely felt in my life, but I know that is what I feel when I think of watching him carry her up to his room that night while she screamed and begged for someone to help her.

I’m still not completely certain of what happened that night, but I know whatever he did broke something inside her. I can’t let it happen again.

I tuck the coin in my pocket and pick up my phone, ready to text her to pack a bag just in case, but then my bedroom door is thrown open and it’s not Beth on the other side.

Rage boils in my brain and lights a fire down my spine. I’m very particular about my privacy. No one comes in my fucking room, ever.

Somehow, Charlie got it in his head that he’s welcome in my space.

Fury races alongside my blood, pumping through my system as I grab him and slam his back against the wall opposite of my bedroom door. The hall light casts shadows down on us as I glare at him.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I snarl, ready to beat his face in, maybe even rip out his eyeballs if he continues to get on my fucking nerves.

“I should be asking you the same thing,” he rasps, his oxygen severely limited by my forearm pressing against his throat.

Everyone knows better than to invade my space. I like my calm, cool, and quiet with zero outside influences. He ruined that by barging in.

“What are you on about?” I sneer as Ronan comes out of his room, running over to try to break this up.

No, I think Charlie wants to die. He has to have a death wish to disturb me.

“Ollie, what are you doing? Let him go!”

“Why don’t you tell him, huh?” Charlie scowls at me, trying to push my buttons further than he already has. “Tell him that you’ve been sliding into Nigel’s place in his absence. Tell Ro how you’ve been sneaking off in the night with Nigel’s girl. Tell him!”

That’s no skin off my back. Ro already knows that I fucked Beth. He dealt with the aftermath and saw how Nigel reacted when I told him that it happened. The fucker laughed.

Nigel doesn’t care that I’ve screwed Beth at all.

“Ollie, let him go!” Ro demands as Oisin enters the hall and helps Ro in removing my arm from Charlie’s neck. The man falls to the ground, coughing and gagging.

“Stay the fuck out of my room,” I demand, making sure it’s clear that is the only reason I just choked him half to death. I have other things to deal with right now.

“What the hell is going on?” Oisin asks, exasperated.

I need to get back in my room and decompress. I can’t handle the stress of this confrontation. I need to relax and assess everything with a level head on my shoulders.