Page 57 of A Billionaire Gentleman

While there were all sorts of activities available, we’d chosen to simply relax. We’d tuned out the rest of the world, ignored clocks, ate when we’d felt like it, and gone to bed when we wanted. We’d lazed about as much as we wanted, sometimes talking and sometimes not.

This morning, we’d spent an hour in the outdoor bathtub simply enjoying being together. The weather was absolutely gorgeous. High seventies to mid-sixties and blue skies. We couldn’t have asked for a more beautiful vacation.

And the longer we stayed, the worse I felt.

This wasn’t Jude giving us something expensive, so I could do what he’d hired me to do, which would’ve been bad enough. Deklin had planned this trip because he thought what we had was real, and it was killing me. I cared about him far more than I should, and every passing moment pulled me deeper and deeper. I knew that telling him would destroy what we had but continuing to keep it a secret wasn’t fair to him.

As I came out of the bathroom, washed clean of all the sand I’d accumulated during our time on the beach, I couldn’t help but smile when I found Deklin waiting for me, his fingers tapping on the counter – a tell of his I’d learned. He was trying not to be impatient about something.

“Will you join me on the terrace?” He held out a hand in a gesture that would have looked at home when he was in a tux as it did now when he wore a pair of shorts and a simple button-up cotton shirt.

“I’d love to.” I took his hand, loving the way our fingers fit together. “You look nice.”

“You look beautiful.”

I blushed, using my free hand to smooth away non-existent wrinkles in the fabric. The eggshell white sundress was my favorite of all the new outfits I’d purchased. It had the rare ability to be both comfortable and pretty at the same time.

“While you were in the bath, I took the liberty of putting together an evening snack.”

We went out the sliding glass doors onto the terrace that overlooked the lagoon, and I gasped when I saw what he’d done. A blanket was spread out across the space, the edge of it nearly dipping into the pool. A bottle of champagne sat in a bucket of ice next to a plate of various kinds of fruit. Large, fluffy pillows covered the space between the blanket and one of the lounge chairs that had been turned sideways, making it possible to lean back.

“You didn’t need to go to all this trouble.” I had to practically whisper, unable to trust my voice not to tremble. “Not for me.”

“I wanted to,” he said as he raised my hand to kiss my knuckles.

I didn’t deserve this. Any of this. Not the trip or the hotel or the romance of champagne under the stars. I didn’t deserve this kind, sweet, generous man.

In that moment, I hated Jude for what he’d asked me to do, and I hated Royd for having found me in the first place.

But I still let Deklin lead me to the blanket, and I still sat down next to him. I smiled as he poured me some champagne, and I sipped the bubbly liquid while he moved the tray of fruit to make it more accessible to me. He put his arm around my shoulders, and the two of us sank back against the pillows and stared up at the sky, the only sound between us the gentle lapping of the water.

At some point, the absent brush of his fingers on my arm shifted from a pleasant reminder of his presence to a growing warmth that spread from cell to cell until my need for him had me turning toward him, reaching to bring his face closer. I sighed as our lips touched, heat rushing through me, consuming everything that wasn’t desire. The scent and taste and sound of him filled my senses, and I knew I was doomed.

“Thank you,” he murmured against my mouth.

“For what?” I asked as I ran my fingers through his hair, trying to memorize the feel of the strands.

“You saved me.” A hand moved up my spine to my neck, long fingers curving around. “I would’ve spent my entire life trying to earn my father’s approval at the expense of my own happiness.”

I closed my eyes, hands fisting the front of his shirt. Dammit!

I was living with the consequences of my bad decisions, the consequences of my own actions. I didn’t deserve how Mead had treated me, but I’d had chances to get out before I’d gotten pregnant, and chances after.

I was trying to fix it, and Jude had offered me an easier way to do that. And while I knew that breaking Deklin and Aurelia up had been the right thing to do, the weight of all the deceit and lies it’d taken to get there made me sick to my stomach.

“How did I get so lucky?” His thumb ran along my jaw. “I can’t think of a single thing I’ve ever done that would make me deserve you.”

It was too much. I couldn’t do it anymore. I had to tell him the truth. I loved him too much not to.

Love.

The word was a knife to my heart, but I didn’t try to soften the blow, didn’t try to convince myself that I’d been right not to try to talk Jude into telling Deklin the truth. I deserved to hurt.

But I was still selfish enough to want to be with him one last time. And I had no doubt that it’d be the last. Whatever meager hope inside me wanted to believe that Deklin would understand and forgive, I quashed, knowing that I’d have to accept whatever came my way for my part in the deception.

I moved, swinging one leg over his lap and settling on his thighs. A quick tug on his shirt popped buttons, and he made a sound in the back of his throat that had all sorts of things inside me clenching. I leaned forward, kissing his tattoo and then making my way up to his collarbone. Adding teeth and tongue, I sucked and licked across his chest, then bit down on his nipple.

“Fuck!” His entire body jerked, and he grabbed my hips, fingers digging in with enough force to bruise. “Sofi…”

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