Page 205 of Scrimmage

The rest are random screenshots. The screenshots, though? Those are the ones that hurt. It’s scores from my games. The football schedule. Alexi and I when we won the championship accompanied by one taken of a TV, and Penny is with her. Every time she said she didn’t care there is proof that she did. There are tattoos and events. News articles, and things Ashland found funny.

There are an overwhelming amount of videos. It took me two weeks to comb through it all. Despite how Ashland acts, it appears that she has been an unwilling star of videos Penny takes. Penny is always trying to get the nitty gritty, and Ashland is always being funny or crass; turning everything into a joke. Freshman year looks like it was fun, but there are points where they seem distressed. I cut Cole from the ones that I can because outrightly deleting this would break Ashland. I just know it.

She never photographs her art. Only Penny’s.

I try to get to know her through her camera roll. The parts of her that she didn’t show me. My only saving grace is that there are parts of Ashland I know, that aren’t seen here.

“Still looking through your girlfriend’s stuff?” Tamara, a nurse, sits next to me with her snack.

After a week, they let Alexi and I stay in the lounge. They felt bad for us. We’ve come to know some of the staff in our time here, and Alexi has fully abused the fact that Ash is lying in a bed sewn back together. He said she would want him to, and I couldn’t argue with that logic, because she would.

“Not my girlfriend,” I mumble.

I don’t bother closing the phone. I just keep scrolling and scrolling. I’ve already sent plenty of it to myself, including stuff of her and Penny on adventures. Any picture or video that Ashland seems happy in is now sitting in my phone and some of the sad ones, too. It’s a psychotic thing to do, but I’ve also been camping out this entire time.

“I mean the competition is hot. I won’t lie.” Nurse Tamara has involved herself in me combing through Ashland’s personal life, so she’s seen some of the photos of her with her ex.

“Not helping.”

“Right. Sorry.” She offers me a twinkie, but I don’t take it. “Well, I heard she woke up.”

“Yeah, she did.”

Sinclair came to get Alexi a while ago to visit her. He’s been cordial with me, and I’ve gotten to know him a little bit. He’s fucking crazy and as much of a dick as Ashland. Apple must not fall far from the tree. I can only imagine what their parents are like. He hasn’t spoken about her much the few times he has come in here with Penny. I’ve learned that he’s from England, and that’s about it. Damien may have been her not-husband, but they don’t talk about him. Not once have I heard one word about him since the night everything happened.

“Are you going to see her?” Tamara asks.

I sigh. “Probably not.”

“She can have visitors though,” she points out.

“Usually, people have to want to see the visitors.”

“I won’t kick you out,” she shrugs.

“No offense, but it’s not you I’m worried about. She might be weak and still healing, but she’ll get out of the bed and punch me in the face if she feels like it.”

“Now it makes sense. She’s a spitfire. That’s why you’re in love with her.”

“I never said that.”

She gives me an apologetic look. “You don’t have to.” The door creaks open and Tamara offers a big smile. “How’s she feeling, Penny?”

“Just waking up and everything. Trying to get her bearings.”

“Well, I’m about to be assigned, so I guess I’ll see you two later.” Tamara shoves her twinkie into her mouth and rushes out, brushing her hands on her scrubs.

I close Ashland’s phone and hold it out. Now that Ashland is awake she’ll probably want it back.

“What the hell is this?” Penny asks, staring at it.

“Ashland’s phone.”

Penny waves it away. “I’m not a delivery service.” She crosses her arms and leans back on the couch, her eyes fluttering shut momentarily before she takes a deep breath and forces them open. “She’s awake.”

“I heard. How is she?”

She sticks her tongue in her cheek. “Asking for you.”

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