Page 35 of Across the Boards

100. WTF Carter? Who are you sexting??

Not sexting. Long story. Accidentally swapped photos with Elliot.

There’s a long pause, and I can practically see him trying to process this information.

WHAT??????? WHAT??????? WHAT??????

It’s not like that

She meant to send a picture to Sarah and got me by mistake. I sent one back to make her feel less embarrassed. That’s all.

That is NOT all. Sarah just called me SCREAMING about this. Elliot sent her lingerie pics meant for you??

I groan. The Phoenix hockey wives telephone game is already distorting reality.

No. She bought new underwear for the gala. Took a photo to show SARAH. Accidentally sent it to ME. I returned the favor to even the playing field. End of story.

Not even close to the end of the story. Sarah says Elliot rated your pic a 15/10. Also says you have “hockey thighs for days” whatever that means.

Heat creeps up my neck. A 15/10? From reserved, cautious Elliot?

Sarah needs to learn about confidentiality.

Although I’m secretly pleased.

Sarah needs to learn a lot of things. But that’s not the point. The point is you and Elliot are exchanging sexy pics and you haven’t even taken her on a proper date yet. Slow your roll, man.

It wasn’t planned! And we’re going to the gala together, that’s a date.

She agreed to that BEFORE the Great Underwear Exchange. You better step up your game now. Expectations have been raised. Literally.

I’m not taking dating advice from a guy whose idea of romance is ordering heart-shaped pepperoni on pizza.

That was ONE Valentine’s Day when all the restaurants were booked! And Sarah thought it was adorable.

Sarah married you despite your terrible romantic gestures, not because of them.

Uncalled for. But seriously, what’s your plan with Elliot? If you just want a hookup, find someone else. She’s been through enough.

The suggestion that I might just be looking for a casual thing with Elliot makes my jaw clench.

You know me better than that. I’ve been interested in her since that Christmas party three years ago.

Then why didn’t you reach out when she and Jason split?

It’s a fair question, one I’ve asked myself repeatedly.

Didn’t seem right. She needed space to heal, not another hockey player in her life. Besides, I was in Boston. Long distance seemed like adding complication to an already complicated situation.

But when you found out she lived here, you coincidentally found an apartment next door...

Townhouse. And it wasn’t just about her. It was a good opportunity. Being neighbors just made it easier to reconnect.

“Reconnect.” Must be one of those fancy Millennial terms.

We’re the same age, asshole.

Details. So when are you telling her that you specifically chose to live next to her?

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