Page 20 of Elusion

With his permission, I launch into an insane man’s rant about absurdist philosophy. The conflict between our search for meaning in a meaningless universe, and even if meaning exists, the amount of knowledge the universe encompasses would be impossible for man to grasp. The only escape routes from the madness are suicide, finding religion, or accepting the absurdity of it all. Of course, while inherent meaning might not exist, one can potentially discover their own meaning as long as they accept the absurd along with it.

Eventually, Dr. Miller raises his hands in the air in defeat. “Mr. Waters, please continue your nap.”

“Thank you, sir.” I lay my head down and sleep for the rest of the lecture.

My final class of the day runs over, leaving three minutes until the dismissal of Callie’s. I turn the key in the ignition and notice the line of cars waiting to exit the parking lot. The only way to arrive on time is to run. Cue my internal screaming as I grab my coat.

When I get there, an empty room waits for me. I check the halls and reach for my phone—the one still sitting in the cupholder of my Jeep. But the location of my phone is irrelevant because Callie never gave me her number.

“No, but you’ll give it to me.”God, I acted cocky. No, Jordan. No, she will not.

I sulk in my defeat for a few seconds before dashing out the door, hoping to catch up with her. I make it all the way to the dorms without spotting any red coats or pink hats.

Felicia answers, surprised to see me.

“I missed her after lit,” I say, dropping onto their couch. “Is she back yet?”

She gives an apologetic look. “No, and she won’t be until Sunday.”

“What?” I’m back on my feet.

“She drove to her last class and went home as soon as it finished. She didn’t tell you?”

I start to pace. No Callie for two days? She’s not warming up to me at all if she didn’t tell me about abandoning campus for the weekend. Why the hell even bother with her? I drag the heel of my hand over the tension forming in my forehead.

“Are you okay?” Felicia asks. “Do you want her number?”

I sigh and stop. “No. She might actually kill you, and I’ve grown rather fond of you, Gibson.” I attempt a smile and tell her goodbye.

The trek to my Jeep feels colder, probably because I’m walking instead of running. I can’t let go of the fact that she didn’t tell me she planned on leaving. The way she smiled at the coffee and breakfast sandwich earlier replays in my head along with the tug of her lips after I kissed her forehead.

Pull it together, Waters.Two days without Callie means no early morning trips for coffee or nearly killing myself, hauling ass across campus in unreasonable timeframes. Her absence gives me a chance to reclaim my freedom. I can go out with the guys over the weekend, maybe find a new distraction. Chances are, by the time she returns, the infatuation will have passed, and I’ll call it quits early.

When I reach for the shifter, my eyes land on my phone. A missed call from my brother shows up. Dustin wants to confirm plans for spring break, but I’m reluctant to agree. In his second year of law school at the University of Pennsylvania, he and his friends define fun as going on a coke bender and hiring escorts. It made for an eventful winter break. Even though he snorts lines off stripper tits on the regular, he still manages to win the Most Outstanding Son award with our parents. Add that to the list of shit I’ll never understand.

Other than a text from Johnny about band practice later, I only have one other message from an unknown number.

Sorry. Waited as long as I could. Gone until Monday.

Callie. She must have finally used my number off the note. Now, if only I could have seen her face when she realized she’d had it this entire time because I added myself to her contacts after the party. The girl should have never left me alone with her phone.

I reply,No worries. I’ll be waiting.

Band practice runs smoothly, and we agree to work on new songs over the next few weeks. Benji and I, with my guitar, plan to work on melodies and lyrics. The other two will help in small quantities, but we all know the most work happens when the twoof us lock ourselves in the soundproof garage without interruptions.

Hopefully, he’ll wait until everything with Callie wraps up. I can’t handle anything else right now—and the irony is not lost on me.

As on most Friday nights, everyone decides to go to the bar. My new schedule has me yawning by eleven, but I’ll go along for wingman duty. While I wait for the guys to primp, I sit on the couch, staring at my phone for far too long.

Callie’s only other message came when I asked if she’d made it safe, and she replied,Yes.

I send her one more text to end our day the same as the last three, allowing for one minor adjustment.

All right, beautiful, I wish I were seeing you tomorrow.

She answers right away.

Goodnight, Jordan.

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