Page 39 of Forever Theirs

I jumped into the truck and slammed the door shut, cutting off his boisterous response. Not that it did any good, considering he was driving the truck I just sealed myself into. Not my brightest moment.

The whole frame shifted as Miles slid behind the wheel after loading Jubie into the bed, face tight with frustration.

“You looked better with that smile from earlier. Let’s go back to happy Miles, eh?”

“Then don’t go pissing me off.” He slammed the key into the ignition and started the engine. “You know the sheriff doesn’t want us talking about it with anyone outside the community.”

“That’s a load of bullshit, and you know it. How many people have gone out on that trail alone or unprepared for what could happen because they’ve kept quiet about it all or refused to listen to our theories?”

Really justatheory, as in a single very strong one.

The one that revolved around some sick bastard snagging unsuspecting women off the challenging trail that went from Anchor Bay to Kenai Fjords National Park, sometimes killing the male partner who traveled with them. We couldn’t figure out why or even what he was doing with them. My gut churned, and the light breakfast I ate rose in my throat just thinking about what he could be doing with them if the missing women were still alive.

“It’s the best way to keep her safe,” I added, knowing that would woo him over to my side. “She deserves to know.”

With a heavy, resigned sigh, he finally nodded in agreement. Behind us, Jubie barked from the truck bed, head hanging over the side, allowing her fur and tongue to flap in the wind as we drove toward The Nest to pick up Aspen.

“But not all the details. We can’t jeopardize their investigation like that, not when there are families who deserve answers and victims who need justice.”

He had a point.

I didn’t have to like it, though.

Restless energy buzzed beneath my skin, the anticipation of seeing Aspen again making me vibrate from the inside out. I couldn’t sit still, much to Miles’s frustration. The entire drive, I fidgeted in the seat, unable to get comfortable for long, played with the radio dial a few hundred times, and rapped my fingers on both knees to where I was even annoying myself. But I couldn’t settle down. There was a lot of pressure around this hike, yet not really. I knew without a doubt she’d have a good time, would get some amazing shots, and have that peace only nature could offer to settle her swirling thoughts. All that was a guarantee, but I wanted her to fucking love it.

Love our time together.

Love us three together.

Love us.

Groaning, I tapped the back of my head against the headrest. “I hate feelings. They fucking suck trying to unweave it all.”

“You’re too far gone on her, aren’t you?”

I scoffed and pointed an accusing finger at him. “And you’re not, Mr. Smiley Pants?” He smirked as if to prove my point. “See, there it is again. You can’t say you don’t feel it. She’s different in all the ways that matter.”

He ran a hand over his short hair before wrapping it around the back of his neck. “There is something between us, but I’m not sure it’s what you’re feeling. You think with your dick more times than not.”

“It’s more than that this time,” I protested, crossing both arms over my chest. “And don’t do that. Not to this.”

“Do what?”

“Deflect. You’re just saying that to make me doubt what I’m feeling, what you’re feeling, too, because you’re scared.”

He shot me anI’ll murder you right here while driving if you say that shit againlook that had me sealing my spine to the door. I swallowed so hard it made an audible sound.

“I’m not fucking scared. But you’re forgetting a bunch of shit, overlooking things I know will push her away. You have that ability to forget how women react to me. I fucking don’t. So don’t say I’m scared when you know—when you pull your head out of your ass—why I’m guarded.”

The guilt that had seemed to abate for the last twenty-four hours roared back to life, putting so much fucking pressure on my chest that I couldn’t breathe. I stared at Miles, desperately sucking down slivers of air.

When he glanced my way at a stop sign, his eyes widened. In a flash, he leaned over, unclipped my seat belt, and shoved my head between my knees.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, brother. I didn’t mean for it to sound like an accusation.” More guilt swirled, knowing he was beating himself up for stirring the guilt I constantly drowned in. “I’m just trying to be levelheaded and not let myself get too close for a shit ton of reasons. I shouldn’t use my scars as an excuse, but I do because I’d rather think it has something to do with my body than her finding out about the other broken parts of me and walking away. I don’t want that for you.”

“And I’m tired of seeing you just existing,” I said, finally able to breathe. Slumping against the window, I sealed both eyes shut, relishing the coolness seeping from the glass to my forehead. “There is so much more out there than what you’re allowing yourself.”

“Yeah, well, not all of us rebound as easily as you. Just give me time. Let me go at my pace. Things have been getting better, even before Aspen arrived.”

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