“Don't worry about it. Forget I ever said anything,” Trey grumbles, clearly upset by my lack of enthusiasm on the subject.
“Trey, don't be that way.” Picking at a loose string on the duvet, I avoid his eyes. “And the way you put it made it sound like you were trying to stake your claim, not confessing your undying devotion to the one you want to spend your life with.”
“You know how I feel about you,” he snaps.
Sighing, I fall to my back and rest both palms on my stomach. “We've been through a lot the past few months, wouldn't you agree?” His grunt causes an exaggerated eye roll I know he can see. “I do want to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but now? It's not the right time, and I think you know that. Deep down you know we should wait.”
“How long, Randi?” The heaviness of his gaze weighs on me as he props back up onto his elbow, resting his head in his flattened palm. “How long do I have to wait to make you mine, for everyone to know? How long do we have to wait until we can be together forever?”
“When I'm out of office?” An acrylic tip cracks beneath the pressure of my nibbling teeth. “Did you even stop to think about your job? How you'd have to quit to become the first husband? Thenyou'dhave agents following you around to protect you at all times, not the other way around.”
I squeak. The room rotates as a firm grip twists me until I'm lying on top of a solid, hot body. A tentative smile plays at his lips, the earlier disappointment fading.
“I don't give a fuck about that job. Once, it was all I had. Those boys were my family. But now there's you, and that's all that matters. I'll wait for you, Randi Sawyer. I'll wait until you're ready, until it's the right time, as long as you can look me in the eye right here, right now, and tell me that you will marry me one day. That one day in the near future you'll allow me the honor of being your husband.”
“Yes.” A half laugh, half sob strangles from my chest.
A deep booming voice reverberates down the hall and echoes in Trey’s small overstuffed room, breaking the moment.
“T?” I rasp, still trying to wrangle my emotions.
“You wanted something normal tonight. There's nothing more normal than hanging out with your friends, right? I texted Tank and Sarah on our way here.” Shoving off the bed, he digs both elbows into the mattress, closing the distance between our faces. His nose brushes against my own. “Come on, Mess. Shove aside the shit day and the marriage conversation I threw on you and come have a beer with me.”
Tears leak, dripping over my bunched cheeks.
Smiling while crying. This is a new development.
“You know I'm a whiskey girl,” I say after clearing my throat.
“I might have a small stash of whiskey you can sip on if you play your cards right.” Shifting, he wraps his arms around my back, sealing our chests together. “Tonight it's just us and our friends, okay? Normal.”
I mouth the word.
It's not the one I'd use for this moment, for the effort he put in all for me.
No, the word I choose is…
Perfection.
Chapter Seventeen
Randi
“Thank you,” I say with a small smile to the woman as she places the edible art on the table in front of where I sit. A low grumble vibrates in my stomach at the savory smells now wafting through the large dining room. Adorning the plate is a colorful display of the most enticing array of beef, vegetables, and a type of fancy rice. “Smells delicious.”
“Sure does.” I fight to ignore Ben’s words—mostly his overall presence—so I don’t lose my eager appetite.
“Excuse me,” Taeler whispers, her face pale, nostrils flaring as she shoves from the long table and bolts from the room with a hand over her mouth.
Ben frowned. “I thought that stuff ended early in pregnancy.”
“For most, yes, but for a few unlucky ones like Tae and me when I was pregnant with her, it could last the entire pregnancy.” I struggle to keep the annoyance from my tone. Tonight was a bad night to do this. I should’ve canceled. After a long day of fixing the world’s problems—or, in some cases, adding to them—I’m in no mood to play nice with my ex. My ex who has this strange delusion that we’ll get back together at some point.
Even now he tosses another one of those longing looks from where he sits across the ten-seat dining room table. Not once or twice but three times now, his foot has rubbed mine in a lame attempt to play footsie. To make matters worse, the alpha team is on shift tonight.
Yep. Trey, current boyfriend and lover, has a front row seat to this shit show, and if the smoke coming from his ears is any indication to his thoughts, Ben better hope he’s still breathing by the time dessert is served.
“Did you really? Get sick that much?”