Page 40 of Revive Me

Again, he hesitates. But after a moment, he says simply, “I wanted to feel something.”

My eyes shoot up to his face with a frown. “What do you mean?”

He shrugs. “After the accident, I got hyper fixated on sensation. I’d try to trick myself into believing I could feel my legs again. When that didn’t work, I started to focus on sensations Icouldfeel. Namely, in my upper body.” His eyes meet mine. “The pain of a tattoo became addicting.”

Oh.I never thought of it that way.

“I was fully intending to tattoo my legs in the spots I got sensation back, but…” He exhales, and it sounds dejected. “I don’t know, I guess I started feeling guilty about the money. I spent way too much on the ink because even though I never had specific tattoos in mind, I realized I preferred the more detailed styles.”

“No kidding,” I murmur, my focus dropping down to the beautifully complex image on his arm. Roman’s entire right arm has a Roman theme, everything from a gladiator to the statue of a god. The way the images are woven together in black and white…it’s incredible.

Without thinking, my fingers trace over the sword on his forearm. “It’s beautiful,” I say quietly. “It must’ve taken forever.”

When I’m met with silence, my gaze darts back to Roman’s face. He’s studying me, watching me admire the art on his skin.

“You have any tattoos, Doc?” he asks after a moment.

I let out an awkward laugh as I straighten. “Me? No. I’d be a total baby.”

Roman’s lip quirks. “So, you’ll jump out of a plane, but a little tattoo is too scary?”

I shrug as I grab a resistance band for us. “That sounds completely logical to me.”

Roman’s chuckle has me relaxing, and I manage a small smile.

“Whatever you say, Doc.”

14

ROMAN

With a heavy groan, I slump down in the seat of the leg extension machine.God, that was hard.

I miss shit being hard. Ilovedwhen workouts were hard. There was a certain level of satisfaction that came from the training sessions that ended with me dead on the couch. It was a sign that I pushed my body as far as physically possible, and that always felt like a victory in itself.

Getting back into strength training these past few weeks has been incredible. It didn’t take me long to realize after my injury that thenot feelingwas a much bigger mental roadblock than I anticipated—some days, I almost wished I felt pain instead of nothing, because at least pain used to be a sign of progress and strengthening. And when I started feeling fireworks in my body a few months after my injury, and I realized it was the sign I was about to recover sensation in that part of my leg, I thought I would have that sense of victory back. But it wasn’t until I really committed to this strength training with Lily that it truly returned. I revel in the soreness these days. And if I’m not sore enough, I go home and do an ab or upper body workout to compensate. Regardless of the muscle being affected, I feelalivefor the first time in what seems like forever.

Lily peeks at the weight the pin is in and frowns. “When did you bump that to twenty pounds?”

I grin through the sweat dripping down my face. “I wanted to challenge myself.”

She shakes her head, but there’s a smile on her lips. “You’re either an underachiever or an overachiever—you never know how to be right in the middle.”

“I don’t like being average,” I muse, chest still heaving with exertion.

“Trust me, you’re anything but average,” Lily murmurs, her eyes still on the chart in her hand.

My grin widens. “Are you saying that as my therapist or as Liliana?”

My question makes her refocus her attention on me with a pinched brow, which then makes her quiet confession register and her cheeks to pinken.

Fuck, I love making her blush.

“So I was thinking…” she rushes to say, crossing her arms over the clipboard on her chest. “We should start doing some gait training exercises. They work best when they’re done concurrently with strength training, so I think we’re at a good spot for it. What do you think?”

I swallow thickly, all humor and playfulness disappearing as memories swarm me.

Sensing my mood shift, Lily’s voice is gentle as she asks, “Have you done any gait training before?”

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