Page 74 of Adorkable

Oh nothing, Mom. My heart’s like one big bruise, but other than that everything’s peachy.

“Just tired,” I mumbled.

“Did something happen last night?”

“Nmph.” I flipped onto my side, giving her my back. The reminder of last night was like putting a chisel to that bruise and pressing down, hard. I didn’t want her to see me crack under the pressure.

“Sally?” she said, laying a hand on my back. A few tears leaked out at the concern I heard there. “Sally, Becks is downstairs.”

“What?” I threw the covers from my head in panic, whirling to face her. Why was he here? I couldn’t let him see me like this. It would ruin everything. “You can’t let him up here, Mom.”

“Why not?” Her painful expression was knowing. Too late I remembered what I must look like, my eyes red and puffy from crying, cheeks tearstained.

“I don’t—” My voice broke, then came back in a low rasp, throat clogged with tears. “I don’t want to see him.”

“Ah, honey.” She gathered me up in a tight hug. “It’s okay. Whatever happened you guys will get past this. You always do.”

I shook my head, wrapping my arms around her.

“Whatever he did,” she went on, “it can’t be that bad, right? You and Becks are great together.”

Nice of her to assume it was his fault, but the only thing Becks did was tell the truth.

Why else would I kiss you?Closing my eyes, my heart gave another painful kick. I’d never forget what he said. As much as it killed me, I needed to stop playing pretend and face facts.

“We’re better off as friends.” I hated the words as soon as they left my mouth.

“Are you sure?” Mom leaned back, keeping her hands on my shoulders. “Sally, maybe—”

“I’m sure.” I tried to put force behind the words. “Me and Becks are done, Mom. It’ll be better this way.”

She smoothed my hair back. “But Sally, he was your first boyfriend, your first love.”

One out of two wasn’t bad. She didn’t know that my first boyfriend was actually no boyfriend at all, just a guy helping out his desperate dork of a best friend. My chest tightened. “I’ll get over it.”

“That’s right.” Mom nodded encouragingly, changing tactics. “There’ll be other boys. They’ll be lining up; just you wait.”

That jolted me. I’d ended all things F.B.F. less than twenty-four hours ago, and already she was back into matchmaking mode. The idea of dating anyone besides Becks—fake boyfriend or not—made me nauseated.

“I think I’m going to take it easy on the guy front, Mom. My heart’s kind of fragile right now.”More like shattered. “I need a little recovery time, you know?”

“Okay,” she said grudgingly as she rose from the bed. At the door, she stopped and glanced over her shoulder. “What should I tell Becks?”

I shrugged, stiff-backed.

“Alright, I’ll handle it.” Just before pulling the door closed, her eyes soft, Mom added, “I meant what I said, honey. There will be other boys. Don’t break your heart permanently over this first one, okay?”

I swallowed. “I’ll try not to.”

Once she was gone I flopped back onto the bed, gazing up at the ceiling. Mom really didn’t understand. Becks wasn’t just the first. He was first, last and all the others in between. I didn’t want anyone else. Becks was it for me. As much as it hurt now, that was the way it’d always been, would always be. Yet no matter how I felt, we were destined to be nothing more or less than friends. I’d made peace with that fact before, and I’d do it again. I’dhaveto do it again. If it was the only way to have Becks in my life, then that was that.

I jumped as my phone buzzed on my nightstand.

Reaching over, I flipped it open and read the text from Becks.

“R U OK?” it said.

I took a deep breath then typed, “Of course I am :)”