Page 144 of The Art of Exiley

“What’s going on?” Michael whispers, shadows playing over his face. The face I was just holding between my hands.

“I can explain—” I choke on a sob.

Why did this have to happen now? Right when I’ve finally decided where I want to be. Because of him. Because of the beautiful world he’s shown me.

He’ll never forgive me.

Kor is still speaking, but nothing could make me care about what he’s saying. I stare into Michael’s torch-lit eyes, and seeing all that betrayal aimed at me, I feel actual, physical pain in my chest.

“Aren’t we lucky for recruiting him?” Kor is beaming at Michael.

Wait.

What?

“Prometheus arranged our introduction.”

His words don’t sink in. It’s like he’s speaking another language. Like my brain isn’t receiving enough oxygen to think, to be able to put the pieces together.

How could Michael be a spy? He’s the most honest person I know.

He’s also the person most likely to want to help provincial people.

Kor is looking back and forth between us with confusion. Then realization dawns. “Oh, I see. I was under the impression you liked the blond one?”

Michael still hasn’t said anything. He hasn’t tried to deny it. Why isn’t he denying it? My throat is tight, and I feel lightheaded. I need him to deny it.

In the darkness, I can’t tell if the crashing in my ears is the waves or my rushing pulse. I can’t tell if it’s sea salt on my tongue or my own tears.

“Ada,” Kor says. “We have to go now. Last chance.”

I want to stay right here, where it’s too dark to see the truth. Where the wind and water can steal reality and drown it with the tide. But that’s not anoption. The options are to go back to the Families with Kor. Or to stay with the Makers but without Michael as my ally… or as anything else.

Only a few moments ago I was so sure that I knew where my allegiances lie. But now? Everyone I choose seems to be on the wrong side.

But my decision isn’t dependent on Michael. My beliefs haven’t changed. The plan isn’t ruined, only altered.

I’m too raw to do more than shake my head.

“If that’s what you want.” Kor leans down and kisses me on the cheek. Then he relights his Sire glow, which illuminates his face like an angelic halo. “Goodbye, Ada.” After one last fervent glance, he heads to the sub.

Michael and I stand in silence. The hull of the submarine creaks as it begins to submerge, spraying water in our direction.

“You’re a great actor,” Michael finally says, droplets of water glistening on his hair in the dark. “I thought it was real.”

But he’s the actor. I see it now. How I have indeed been too young for him all along. A naive girl, so easily manipulated into thinking I knew who he was, when I really had no idea. The memory of his kiss that had been warming me now feels like ice. I want to claw through my stomach and pull out the feelings that have taken root.

I rekindle my Sire glow so we can talk face-to-face. “I’m surprised you agreed to betray your home,” I say.

“The provincial world is a beautiful place, and it deserves to share our knowledge,” he replies stiffly. “You successfully convinced me of that.” His jaw twitches.

“But… you know they’re the ones who took Hilde? That they’re going to use her for her blood?”

“How do you feel about that?” he challenges.

This question feels like a trap. I can’t jeopardize my plan by making the Families, or their spy, doubt my commitment.

“I’m just surprised that you’re okay with their methods.”