Page 50 of Still Made For You

I found it difficult to ask for help because of my upbringing. We were always taught to figure things out on our own. My mother would often suffer before asking someone for anything. Was it healthy? Probably not, but I’ve adapted to those toxic habits since it was all I knew.

“It feels like you’re judging me.” My head dropped in mock shame.

“Girl, ain’t nobody judging you. We want you to feel comfortable leaning on us. Our children are cousins so you’re a part of this family too. Stop treating us like red headed stepchildren.” I nodded.

“Let her know, Yaya. She already knows my little baby is welcome to come over Tee-Tee River’s house anytime he pleases.” River interjected.

The ladies in Freedom’s family embraced me without hesitation. I thought River would start acting funny after I had the baby, but she’d been my rock as she always has been.

“Babe, is there anything you need from the store? I sent Solomon and the boys to the store for some more charcoal.” Messiah yelled from the sliding door.

“Tell them to grab a few more cases of pop and some more hot dog buns. I picked up everything else on the list this morning.”

“Alright bet. Aye, stand up for me real quick.” Messiah requested. We all glanced in her direction as she stared at him with a perplexed expression on her face.

“What are you talking about?” Yaya pressed, while stepping out of the pool. Messiah observed her silently for a moment.

“Turn around for me.” He instructed.

“‘Siah, what’s the problem?” Miyana grew aggravated at his intrusive request.

“Damn, you fine as a mothafucka!” Messiah licked his lips as he stood there gawking at his wife.

“Are you gonna tell me what all that was about?”

“Yeah, some of the fellas from the team are coming over so I needed to see how fine my wife was out here looking. I fuck with them heavy, but I’ll drop them where they stand for drooling over what’s mine.” I snickered at their banter. I loved how overprotective and loving these men were over their women. They go so hard for them, but they will also throw hands in order to protect them.

“Boy, bye, you’re always doing the most.” She huffed, walking back over to the pool.

“Oh, I’m a boy now? Weren’t you calling me daddy this morning? If I remember correctly, it was “Yes, daddy, please don’t stop!” Now all of a sudden, I’m doing too much.” I covered my mouth to keep from hollering out loud. Messiah gave no fucks about what came out of his mouth. Yaya’s face turned bright red as she walked back to the pool.

“Damn right, I did. Now what? My girls already know that you fuck the Mario coins out of me, and you still do too much. Childish ass.”

“It’s alright, I’ll be that. You're gonna be sitting on this childish ass face tonight.” Messiah winked, making her blush.

“And will!. I need it good and sloppy too since you want to act up in front of company.” I found their banter so cute, secretly hoping to find someone I could laugh at and have fun with one day.

“Please get a room!” Serenity pretended as if she was going to throw up.

“Green doesn’t look good on you. Plus, weren't you telling my homie about how you want to-”

“Messiah! You better not! I didn’t know y’all were with him so mind your business!” Serenity shrieked.

“I thought so. Let me leave y’all asses alone. I’m about to check on this meat, Yaya, come holler at me in about ten minutes.” Her face told me they were going to be doing more than talking.

“Have you thought about dating now that Sincere has gotten older or are you and Freedom still a thing?” Ty quizzed.

“I’m afraid to date, If I’m being honest. The train wreck between Freedom and I left me afraid to date. Men my age seem to be immature, and I don’t have time for it. I’m a mother so I need someone who is patient and understanding. My time is limited as it so I can’t afford to have it wasted.”

“Are you open to going on dates? Messiah has quite a few single teammates. Maybe we could set up a double date if you’re up for it.” Yaya suggested. The thought alone sent me into a panic.Was I ready to start dating?

“There’s nothing to be afraid of. It can be casual until you make a connection with someone. You’re a mother, but you’re a woman first. We all crave companionship even if it’s nothing more than a few dinner dates. You’ve got to start doing things for yourself. Hell, if nothing else, get your back broken a few good times. “

“Exactly, Bree. You’re fine as hell and young. Having a baby doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice having a life. It’s all about finding balance. Don’t allow one bad experience to keep you from possibly finding love. Trust me, I didn’t want anything to do with men after dealing with Orion’s dad, but then I met Loyal. That man walked into my life and flipped my world right side up. Don’t close your heart off to love.” Ty’s advice hit home for me.

I’ve been so caught up in Freedom, no other man has been able to get close to me. I needed to at try to see what was out there before I completely closed myself off to men.

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